Gone
by Apocalyptic-Mess
Summary: The day her life disappeared is the day Courtney starts living. With only one thing left behind. A word. Croatoan. Can Sam and Dean help Courtney and her sister move on? Sam/Courtney COMPLETE
1. Pulse

Chapter 1 - Pulse

**Courtney**

Everything always starts with "I thought I was normal." Every book, every movie; the person always has to be normal.

My story starts with the fact that I never was normal. Normal was never an option for me. Ever since I can remember, I knew I was different. Not a freak, just different. I believed in things, I heard things… I saw things. Things that would have scared the living shit out of anybody else. Things that gave kids nightmares.

I had seen the thing in my closet. It had killed my brother.

And _something _had come here. Tonight. And now _this_ was happening. One second, I was walking with my friends, trailing after the tour guide, and the next, I was alone. Stranded. In the middle of the night. In a fricking graveyard.

I mean seriously, come on! It felt like the beginning of some sad, low budget horror film. One minute there, the next, gone. Nothing. Not even a ruffle in the wind. The bitter October wind cut through my flimsy hoodie. I didn't even shiver. I was into movies. Like borderline obsessed with them, and if this was a movie, I knew what was going to happen next. Hallowe'en. Full moon. Stupid blonde girl running scared through a graveyard. Except… I refused to be that stupid blonde girl that everyone felt sorry for.

I dropped my bag and looked around. Assess the situation. Okay, it was dark. Really, really dark. I crouched down and after rummaging though the contents of my bag, found my flashlight.

I know, weird, but there was a lot of weird in my life, and even weirder things stashed in my bag. And hey, I'd learned from the best.

I gave the immediate area a once over, just to make sure I was alone; there was nothing but trees, headstones and darkness, then I pointed the beam of light ahead of me to where the guide had last been standing. The light flashed over an onyx headstone, and I stopped. 

My thoughts were cut short. The only warning I had was the spatter of blood that suddenly appeared on the headstone.

I blinked, the blood disappeared, and I dove to the side, away from my bag and the bullet that was now lodged in the tree straight ahead.

Only one weapon left in my arsenal; stupidity.

I leapt up, my legs becoming slightly tangled by my dress over jeans fashion statement, made a mad dash for my bag, and I started to run. Not the normal, _oh frick I need to get away _run either. It was more like, _fuck, I'm gonna die_. 

I'd never had that feeling before, the fight or flight fire burning through my veins. It had always been an easy decision for me; fight, or get the fuck outta there before the guns come out.

Apparently the guns had come out early. And so I was running. Running through the impenetrable darkness, having no sense of direction. Just running, because at least I could put some distance between myself and the thing shooting at me. I didn't even want to see it's face if, or when, it finally got me. And I still didn't know what _IT_ was. Was it human? Was it someone I knew? Could it be a shape shifter, or was it a demon?

And where the hell was everyone? _Don't panic, don't panic. _I, like everyone else around here, had heard stories of things happening, legends, but nothing ever like this. Not people just disappearing only to have moments later some crazy psycho serial killer after you. I darted through the headstones, behind mausoleums, searching for solace in the trees, but nothing could be found. The darkness itself should have been enough. The best hope I had was getting to the edge of the forest on the outskirts of the graveyard and losing it there.

_How do you know it's alone?_ My overactive brain suggested. I mentally hit the 'off' switch and flipped into survival mode. Run, run, run. Thrum, thrum, thrum. One foot in front of the other. Quick, quick, quicker… Don't stumble. Just run. I fell into the steady rhythm, my breath panting almost soundlessly as I tried to hold onto those last few moments of life. 

What about Aliese? Had she vanished too? Where did the people go when they… poofed out? Did they die? Was I stuck in some kind of invisible bubble?

Was I dead?

No, no, no. Aliese. I needed to find and save Aliese. She would be scared. She wouldn't have vanished. She was part of me… I would have known. She was the only one left. She was still here… If 'here' was a place anymore. 

BANG!Another bullet just whipped beside my head, sending tendrils of fine, glowing hair whipping around my face. My breath was coming in shorter gasps now, and I could feel the fire in my lungs and my legs were on fire, and I wouldn't, couldn't, hold on any longer. My feet burned, and I knew I'd have blisters tomorrow. Stupid flats. I should have worn runners. I kicked them off while still running. The edge of the trees was just a few feet away, and as I closed the distance between the trees and me, I had a sudden realization.

_I might not live to see tomorrow._

_I might never got the chance to see him again._

The thought brought along bitter, heart broken feelings. Feelings that I'd tried to suppress since he'd left. Almost four years ago…

"Hey!" The voice calling for me didn't break my stride. It was the thing behind me, and I wouldn't let it fool me. 

One more step… and I broke through the edge of the woods. A few feet in, I leapt over a fallen log, careful not to touch or break any of the other branches (quite a difficult feat) because I knew a good hunter would be able to track me in a matter of seconds.

But I didn't really care anymore. No Aliese… No parents… Not even _him_.

I held my breath as I heard the branches scraping against each other, and two distinct sets of foot steps. I crouched low, absent mindedly clutching at my faithful Beretta 93R. The grip was warm beneath my palms, but I steadied my hand, bringing it up and resting it on the fallen tree as a base.

The foot steps stopped. A black spider crawled onto my right hand. I looked down at it, my eyes flickering over the carved wood, and flicked it off.

That's when I saw it.

That one word.

_Croatoan._

I would never, never in a million years, forget that one moment where everything stopped. The trees halted their calming sway, the wind grew still and time seemed to all but stop. Just for that second.

Then I started to scream. 

Those things following me, shooting at me, meant nothing anymore. 

Everyone was gone. EVERYONE. No one would be spared. No one would ever be seen again. And that meant my friends, my family.

Aliese.

Now I was asking for it. My death wish. _Just kill me now. Kill me and save me from myself._

Maddi and Annabell, the girls I'd been with when everyone had disappeared, my friends, they were gone. Gone and never coming back. And probably Cami, too. My next door neighbor.

It felt like they took too short a time to find me. 

And when they found me, it felt like eternity.

Me, being the abnormality that I was, stood straight up and turned to stare at the two black shapes pointing their guns at me. I pointed mine straight back. I blinked again, just to make sure I wasn't hallucinating. Just to make sure that I was still alive.

"You shot at me."

The shock of my words jolted the night, and I distantly heard a wolf howl. Great, cue the horror movie sound effects. The things didn't lower their weapons. I wished they'd just shoot already.

"You were screaming," the taller one stated. His gun dropped half an inch.

From experience, I knew that monsters didn't need guns. So… definitely human. My finger froze on the trigger. I hesitated.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," a husky voice warned; the shorter one. I wrinkled my nose in disgust. As if I would really listen to someone who was just trying to kill me not five seconds ago.

My life was already Hell. "Just so happens I've decided that suicide is my best course of action right now. So shoot." I snapped, marveling at their stupidity. God, if they took very much longer, I would have to kill myself already.

Apparently, my words got through to someone. The taller of the two lowered his gun and motioned for the other to do the same. While they were distracted with that, I held up my flashlight and pointed it at them. "Bang," I whispered. They blinked in surprise and held up their hands to shield their eyes.

I shook my head sadly. They could both be dead by now. Out loud, I asked, "What the hell are you?"

Now that I had pierced the darkness, their features came into light. I stifled a gasp. The shorter guy looked older, about 25, with short dark hair and sharp features. He wore a dark blue jacket, jeans and a pair of worn out hiking boots. I did have to admire his muscle for a moment, I mean, come on, 19 year old girl here, but other than that, he just glared at me and his arm twitched with his raised his gun. I smiled cheekily into the darkness in response.

But when my eyes found _him_, I could feel the pulse in my head, pounding so loud that it nearly drown out every other sound. He was even more handsome than I could have possibly hoped to remember. His shaggy light brown hair came to just above his bright green eyes, and he wore nothing more than a hoodie and jeans and a pair of well-worn sneakers. He looked so… normal. Average. In my eyes, though, he was… perfect. My knees shook and my head felt light. I hated the feeling, yet I never wanted it to end. Swallowing the feeling, I allowed my self a breath. Just one.

Not what, _who_.

"Sam Winchester." I whispered into the darkness, lowering my light and putting the safety on my gun. "Never thought I'd see you around here again." My words were sharp, bitter. Painful.

It was quiet for a long moment before I heard the shorter one, which I now knew to be Dean, mutter, "Do you know everybody around here, Sammy?" In an exasperated voice.

Sam took a couple steps foreword. "Courtney? Is that you?"

Anger flared. "The one and only, Winchester. Now you wanna explain to me what the hell happened?" 

"Courtney, I had school. You knew-"

Rage clouded my vision. "Knew?! Is that why you just took off? I never even got to say goodbye!"

Something sparked in Sam's eyes and he took another step closer to me. We were just about touching now. "I wasn't the one that said never come back. I was 19. Hell, you would have been only what, 16? I thought you would forget about me."

He'd left. Left and he'd never came back, never explained a thing to me. And now he was feeding me this? All these poor, lame excuses?! Who the hell did he think he was?

"Guys," Dean tried to interrupt. "We've got bigger problems-"

"Forget?!" I shrieked. "How could I ever possibly forget the first guy I ever-"

"Whoa, too much information. Someone wanna fill me in?" Dean interrupted, this time successfully. "Let's start with how the hell you two know each other."

I shook my head, the internal fire still burning. I really, really wanted to punch Sam, just to have something to compare my pain too, but that would have been counter productive. Sam muttered a "long story" to Dean before _it _started again. 'It' being the main abnormality that was me. My visions.

_Blood… Guns… Shouting and pain…_

_Demons._

"_We'll be waiting…"_

My eyes snapped open and I found myself staring into concern filled light green orbs. I groaned and tried to sit up, but Sam's hand on my shoulder stopped me.

"Don't move," he urged, gently pushing me back down.

"Oh, as if now you care," I snapped, pushing his hand away. When I sat up, my head started to swim, but I picked myself up carefully with next to no effort. But even as my internal battle between beating the shit out of Sam and letting him live for just long enough to flee from my sight ragged uselessly, I felt the first flicker of hope. 

He had come back.

"Courtney, it wasn't-" Sam started.

"Look," Dean cut Sam off again, appearing to the right of me and holding up my bag. "I'd love to sit here and watch Desperate Housewives play out, but we've gotta go."

My eyes widened and I made a quick grab for my bag, but Dean held it back, out of my reach. I stumbled and Sam had to catch and steady me before I could fall. I glared at Dean. His eyebrows rose. "Give it," I snarled, glaring with as much hate as I could possibly muster without having another fainting spell again.

Dean chuckled and stared at me in amusement. Apparently to him, this was all just a game. Well, I liked games, but not tonight. Sam was here. I could be semi-grateful for that. He might have the answers that I lacked. Aliese was… I don't know. I still needed to find her.

Sam hovered next to me, waiting to catch me if I fell. Which, if I did happen to fall, wouldn't have been because of the visions. I'm just naturally uncoordinated. I took a slow, deliberate step away from him. Out of the corner of my eyes, I could see him flinch. Dean muttered a low, 'ouch,' before slinging my bag over his shoulder and turning his back on me and started walking. Sam took a step ahead of me, hesitated, glanced back and opened his mouth, but decided better of it and turned his back on me, shoulders slumped. 

As much as I felt that Sam should have to at least share a portion of my pain, I felt a sharp stab of pain in my chest. 

Subtly, without making even a whisper of noise, I reached for my pocket to check for my Beretta. Empty. "Shit," I whispered, staring at their retreating backs. They were going slow enough for me to catch up, but not fast enough for me to find an escape.

"Just precautionary," Dean shouted back at me, glancing over his shoulder. "You'll get it back when we're sure we can trust you. Now… You coming or not?"

I hesitated. As much as I didn't want to let them out of my sight, especially Sam, I knew what they were going to do. "Where exactly is it that you're going?" I asked, partially because I hoped I was wrong. Mostly because I wanted Sam to turn around and talk to me again. I mentally told my heart to shut up.

But it wasn't Sam who answered me. He stayed, back turned, facing the far side of the cemetery where I could see the dim outline of a low, dark car. I stared at his back. 

"Out of town." Dean answered. "You can either come with us," he glanced sharply at Sam. "Or find your own way out. But there's nothing left. We-"

"I know." I said sharply, remembering the lone word engraved on the bark. I raised my head. "but I have to stay."

This caused Sam to not only turn around and stare at me, but for his eyes to widen in horror. "What?" He whispered, barely audible.

"Listen, girl-" Dean began.

"It's Courtney." 

"Uh huh, okay, Courtney, just come with us, we'll contact someone that you can stay with, we'll drop you off, and you can go on living as if this never happened. This is just a weird, random nightmare."

"I can take care of myself."

At the suspicion and sheer disbelief with which his gaze directed at me, I rolled my eyes. "Sammy here taught me. And John." Now that I'd said it… "Hey, where is your dad?"

You know when you have those points in time that life just seems to hate you? Ya, this must have been one of mine. Sam looked at me like I'd just announced I was going kill myself, and Dean stared at me, his fists clenched, as if he wanted to punch me and dump holy water down my throat. Which, he probably did. 

OH. Oh shit. I stared at Sam until he looked away. I spoke to Dean, but my attention was on Sam. I shook my head sadly. "I'm sorry, but I have to stay."

Apparently, I wasn't the only one who couldn't hold onto the anticipation and jitteriness any longer. Sam whipped around and turned to glare at me. "Why, Courtney? Why do you always have to be in the middle of it? Can't you just give it up this one time? Do you have a death wish or something?"

My eyes hardened and my smile was forced. "Well, I can honestly say that I've never run away from anything. Can you say the same thing, Sammy?"

Sam was frozen by my words, his eyes shocked and vulnerable. I honestly felt sick after accusing him of it, but… if it was true, then ya, he had run away from _us_. "Courtney, I'm sorry. Can we please go now?"

Aliese. Aliese, Aliese. My mind prodded me, making every thought come back to her. I needed to find her. I shook my head. "I've gotta find Aliese, my sister," I explained to Dean's blank stare. "I'm not leaving without her. We'll… We'll catch up with you in the next town, or something." Trying to reason with people who _know_ you're lying is harder than you'd think.

Dean glanced between Sam and me, but I just stared over his left shoulder, out into the ever pressing darkness. Dean shook his head, and I let out my breath. In silent agreement, we started walking. At one point between point A and point B, Dean handed me back my bag and we arrived at his car. At some other time, I would have taken the time to admire his car, but not know. I was drained, and I needed to find my sister.

"So it's true," I whispered, getting into the backseat of the Impala and staring out the window. 

"What's true?" Sam spoke up, his voice blank.

"Croatoan." I replied, taking the time to become aware of the engines purr and watch the scenery start to shift. "I saw it on the tree back there."

Sam and Dean glanced at each other, this… knowing look that I couldn't possibly understand.

"Fuck," Dean stated, stepping on the gas. 

I looked between Dean and Sam, but they refused to notice my stare. _Oh sure, shoot at a girl, but when she wants answers, pretend she's not even there. Nice gentlemen you'll make._

I sighed and leaned my head against the back of the seat. I just wanted to find Aliese. Everything would be better then. Maybe something would make sense. 

Maybe I'd find answers. And my visions would stop.

"_We'll be waiting…"_


	2. Vanish

Chapter 2 - Vanish

**Aliese**

Tonight was _my_ night, I remember thinking, as I smiled widely and handed out candy to the three kids dressed as farm animals; one little boy a horse, another a cow, and the little girl a sheep. I giggled and laughed and asked them if they'd gotten very much candy. When they smiled, exchanged glances and shook their heads, I laughed and gave them another handful. They just smiled wider and laughed, and turned around to continue on.

And then they disappeared.

I remember thinking that I needed to lay off the apple cider and I giggled nervously. Dimly, I think I may have feared for my mental health. But then again my mental health was something that I feared for on my best days. And it wasn't _me_ that saw things. I just heard things. Whispers…

I'd called for Lacie and Jeff, my adopted parents, and had just shaken my head when there was only silence. I didn't panic. Nothing was wrong; Jeff probably just had the TV on too loud again.

I didn't start to panic till I went into the kitchen and saw the box of cheerios on the table and the milk carton half empty across the floor. I stared at it for a second, watching the pool slink closer to my feet. I'd never seen anything like this in my life… Okay, so that may sound weird, but Lacie was a complete control freak with major OCD. There wasn't a speck of dust out of place in our entire house. The house was quiet.

Even from my mind.

The pool of white reached my toes, and I shivered as it began to seep under my foot.

Now was about time the panic set it.

"Lacie? Jeff?" I shouted, running through the kitchen to the living room. Nobody. I took off up the stairs, past my room, past Courtney's room. The door to Lacie and Jeff's room was open. The actual room itself was deserted. "LACIE! JEFF!"

I paused a moment in my frantic shouting, taking a few seconds to be thankful that at least Courtney was out of the house, and trying to calculate the possibility that Lacie and Jeff were dead and stuffed in a closet somewhere and now the murderer was searching the house for me. That thought alone was enough to shut me up and race down the stairs. I slipped on the milk puddle and landed in it, soaking my frost blue fairy costume. Unlike some people who don't notice a thing when they're panicking, I noticed, and I cursed the highest power I could possibly think of. I stood up quickly, catching myself on the kitchen table, and grabbed my phone and Lacie's car keys.

The adrenaline running through my veins propelled me foreword and out the front door. I didn't stop to look back, but I did stop as I reached the end of the driveway.

Tonight was Hallowe'en. The moon was up, it was only 9: 30, and it wasn't that cold. All perfect conditions for trick-or-treaters, so… where were all the little kids?

The street was absolutely blank. No kids running around, just fake Hallowe'en decorations blowing in the slight breeze. Not even Mr. Jansen taking out his trash. I ran, the sidewalk rough and uneven underneath my feet, to the next house. I banged on the door; nobody home. I ran to the next one; bang, bang, bang. Nothing. Next. And the next.

I'd almost made it around the whole street before my breath began to come in pants and my lungs and calves burned.

It was like… my breath caught in my throat; like everyone had just disappeared.

Like those little kids I saw disappear.

"Fuck!" I screamed, my voice disguised as a sob. Remembering the phone in my hand, I clumsily flipped it open and tried to dial Courtney's number. She was into this kind of stuff. The impossible stuff. She would know… It took me a few tries before I got her number right, between the tears and the hyperventilating.

_Beepbeepbeepbeep_. No…

So the phones weren't working.

I cursed and started to hop on my toes. Just for something to do to distract my mind.

Had Courtney ever said anything about a safe place? A meeting place? _Think, think, think_, I chanted internally."_God, Aliese, listen!" Courtney whined playfully, poking me in the shoulder and dragging her fingers down my arm like a cat. I stuck my tongue out at her._"_What?" I asked in mock annoyance, looking up from my laptop. We sat at a table in the far corner of a café, drinking hot chocolate. It was the day before Courtney's 16th__ birthday, so I was only 13. That whole week Courtney had been acting weird, all smiley… and giggly. She giggled a lot more. And she sneaked out of the house when she thought I was sleeping. I knew enough not to tell Lacie or Jeff, after all, Courtney was my sister. We were family. _

_But right now… I would never admit it, but Courtney was beginning to scare me. _

"_Aliese… We need to have a place we meet up. Like… if we ever need to find each other." Courtney said staring at me, frowning._"_But how do we know the other will be there?" I asked naively, staring at her with wide eyes._"_Well…" she stalled, biting the end of her pen. "You have your mind thing. And I have my visions."_

_My anger flared at her words. "Oh. Oh thanks."_

_Courtney stared at me obliviously as I turned back to my computer, pretending to ignore her. "What? What did I say? Aliese… please, I'm sorry for whatever I said. Just… I dunno, tell me or something." She ranted, trying to get my attention. "Don't be mad…"_

"_Don't be mad?!?" I whispered harshly. Her green eyes stared at me in surprise. "Courtney, sometimes I don't get you. You act all protective, all older sibling, but then treat me like a freak the other half of the time when we're alone."_"_What? No I don't, Aliese. When have I ever-"_"_Like right now!" I exploded, slamming the top down on my computer and beginning to stuff it in my bag. The few other people in the café stared at me. I began to whisper heatedly. "You're always talking about how you have visions. Visions. Premonitions. You have about twenty names for it, but what about me?! I just _hear _things. It's a 'mind thing'. I fucking hear people's _thoughts_, Courtney."_

_We sat there in total silence, just staring at each other. Courtney would never admit it, but she was fucking pissed. She just had more self restraint than I did. "You're a pain in the ass, you know that Aliese? And don't swear. It's bad."_

"_But you swear!"_"_But I'm the older sibling."_"… _idiot."_"_Jackass."_

_She stared at me until we both broke out in laughter. A sudden thought came to me. "Here," I wheezed in between breaths. _

"_What?" Courtney asked still laughing, staring at me in confusion. _"_Here. We'll meet here. This will be our safe spot."_

_I watched the smile break across her face. "And hey, if it makes you feel any cooler," Courtney rolled her eyes. "I'll call it reading. You're ability."_

_My smile softened and I wanted to jump over the table to hug Courtney, but the people in the café were already giving us weird glances, even though we hadn't spoken loud enough for any of them to hear us. "Thanks, Courtney. You're really awesome, you know that?"_

_She brushed off the compliment. "I've always been awesome. That's what older sisters are for: to make their little sister look better."_

_A second ago, I wanted to hug her. Now I wanted to slap her. _

_Courtney's eyes glazed for a moment and when she came too, she was glaring at me. _

Stupid visions_, I thought. "What?" I said innocently, staring at her._

_She smirked._

"The café." I gasped, snapping the phone shut and clutching the keys tighter in my hands. Thank god Courtney had taken it upon herself to teach me how to drive when I'd turned 14. Legally, I didn't have my license. _But whose gonna stop me?_ I thought rebelliously.

I ran to Lacie's car that sat in the driveway. It wasn't ideal on speed, but what other choice did I have?

"_Hotwire,"_ Courtney would have told me.

I shook my head. I thought older sisters were supposed to be protective, not encouraging of bad behaviors.

The panic was now flushed out of me, and all I could think were depressing thoughts of, what if…? What if she had disappeared too? Why was I left?

Was I dead?

No. I refused to think those thoughts. I threw the car into drive and stomped on the gas, peeling out of the driveway with ease. I silently thanked Courtney for always thinking ahead.

The drive was long and silent. My cell phone sat on the seat beside me, and I glanced at it every few seconds, contemplating trying to call Courtney again. Even knowing that it wouldn't work. I was jittery and jumpy and my fingers played a rhythmic beat on the steering wheel as I drove precariously through the blackened streets and around deserted cars.

In the end, the silence was too much. I was driving through deserted streets with nothing but the moonlight; and it felt like a spotlight centered on me and only me.

"Screw this," I mumbled, plugging my iPod (which had been in my pocket) into the adapter and pressing play.

"_It's the end of the world as we know itIt's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel 's 6 o' clock – TV hour. Don't get caught in foreign tower. Slash and burn,return, listen to yourself-"_

NEXT. I franticly pushed the skip button.

"_Mass starvationContaminated waterDestroyed citiesMutilated bodiesMemories of tomorrow – too latefor sorrowPush the button,kiss goodbye the nuclear arsenal-"_

WTF? Since when did I have all these world destruction, end of the world songs on here?!? Growling at the irony of it, I scrolled down to my play list entitled "Happy." and pressed play.

"_I'm sitting in a room,made up of only big white wallsand in the halltheir's people looking throughthe window and they only know exactly what we're here for."_

I shook my head in frustration and grabbed the ipod and threw it on the seat.

Fuck, life was idiotic.

The fact that I'd been driving for only about 4 minutes caused me to groan, slam my forehead against the horn and press on the gas. I bet I could've been a racecar driver, had this not happened. Hey, that was actually a good idea. Note to self: Become professional racecar driver.

Note to self: Never tell that idea to Courtney.

_Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up..._ I just wanted to see Courtney. I just wanted to be able to see that she, even if everyone else was gone, would be alright.

I pulled into the deserted parking lot, parking between a white SUV with the door still open and a black I-don't-know-what muscle car. I glanced at it in interest before grabbing my things and rushing to the front door of the cafe; maybe Courtney would let us hotwire _that _car when we needed to drive out of here.

The cafe was, obviously, deserted. Blank. Devoid of any human life, except... I stared around the lone room, with the walls painted a earthy shade of green, and the dark coloured tables and chairs, and I _felt_ something. I took a step into the cafe, the door bell ringing noisily in the pure silence.

A thought occurred to me;_ Reading_. If anyone was in or near the building, I'd be able to hear them. I closed my eyes and began to massage my temples, trying to... I don't know how to explain it. Pick up a signal, almost. And just as I touched something, it pulled back.

_Shit._

That thought hadn't come from me, but the next one did. _Fuck! _I could feel the barrel of the gun pressed up against my back, and I tried to suppress the sob that threatened to slip off my tongue. I should have known, where there is Courtney, there is trouble. But my thoughts were a mile away. Had they caught Courtney and forced her to tell them that this is where I'd be? Did they have someone with my same ability? That would still leave the fact that they would have to be within range of Courtney, and I found that hard to believe that they would have done that without Courtney shooting them first.

And who the hell were _they_?

My heart lurched at the sound of a voice: a voice I could never forget. It came from my right, but I refused to turn my head with the person holding a gun to me."Aliese...? Is that... you?"

I scoffed, of course it was me! Who else could it be? "Courtney?" Tears threatened at the back of my eyes. "Courtney, is that really you?" My voice broke. I was surprised when the pressure on my back dropped and something barreled into me. I hugged Courtney around the waist, considering she was a whole half a head taller than me, and cried into her chest, spitting out garbled nothings. "I thought I'd lost you... Why did you leave...? The phones... not working... Nobody. Absolutely nobody left..." I ranted uselessly, as Courtney just ran a hand soothingly over my hair, cooing things like "it's alright," "you're safe now," and "I'm here. I won't let anything hurt you."

We were together, she hadn't vanished, and now, we were alone. Everything would be fine.

_Then who was holding the gun on you?_

That thought made me break away from Courtney as she stared at me with sorrowful eyes. For the first real time, I looked around. Two figures came into view, and I had to squint to make them out. The one looked almost familiar... But the other was a loss. I would have remembered him, had I ever met him before.

"Who the hell are you?" I hissed at them, grabbing Courtney's hand for reassurance that she was still there. Courtney giggled and I stared at her hard. Well at least she knew these people enough to trust them, and she wasn't going all protective, so my tense shoulders relaxed.

Before Courtney could introduce me, the taller of the two stepped foreword and stared at me. "You said something about 'nobody left.' What did you mean by that?"

Courtney snorted and glared at the tall figure, making him flinch and take a step back. I felt a warmth of pride inside my chest. My sister could take on a 6 foot something guy with only a glare! I glanced at her in awe. My sister was awesome. I waited patiently as she snapped at the guy. "Croatoan, Sam. That means _everyone's gone_. Nobody. Is. Left."

"Whoa, chill Miss Genius," the short one responded, holding up his hands to signal the taller one, Sam, to shut up. "Sam and I, we've been through this before. They don't _just vanish_. It's a virus. Some of them stick around for a bit-"

Just then, I let out a startled cry as something pierced my shoulder followed milliseconds later by the sound of breaking glass. It felt white hot and I swear to god, I'd never been in so much pain before. The shock of the wound did seem to somehow numb the pain, but not enough. I pressed a hand to my shoulder, pulling my hand away, I saw a dark red smear.

"Someone just shot me." I said. Or maybe I thought it. Though I'm pretty sure I said it because the short guy snorted and before going all... crazy zombie attacker, Left 4 Dead, and spinning around to let louse a string of gun fire. Courtney stared at me in horror as the wound bled out and I fell to the ground, my head spinning. Before I knew what was happening, someone picked me up and we were running through the now broken door. My head lolled to the side for just a moment.

The moment I saw Courtney take out a gun and shoot one of her best friends. _Sadie_, I thought. But something made me keep from shouting out; the look on both their faces as Sadie jumped through the window of the cafe. Courtney's was one of broken pain. Sadie's one of sheer madness.

I think I may have passed out, because when I came too, all four of us were pilled into the black muscle car I'd parked next to and Courtney was in the back seat with me, holding something over my searing shoulder. My head felt light, like it might float away, but my thoughts stayed put.

"You just shot Sadie." I mumbled, barely coherent. "You've know Sadie since you were seven."

"That wasn't Sadie." Courtney replied shortly. "Now stop moving."

And somehow, remembering the look on her face, I believed her.

---------------------------------------------------

**A/N: Hey people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hai, so if you're reading this, then obviously you've read the latest chapter in my story. I'll be updating quite often, hopefully, so I really hope you'll stick with the story and review your thoughts. Thanks so much!!!!!**

**OH! I have a slight challenge for you: If you want, I'd like you to either review or message me with how you think Sam and Courtney know each other and if you think that they should get together in the end. Just keep in mind, your comment will not affect the story in anyway(I don't think, unless it's a REALLY good idea) I would just like your opinion. :D Thanks!!!!!!**


	3. Departure

**Chapter 3 - Departure**

**Sam**

Whoever said absence makes the heart grow fonder obviously never got to meet Courtney.

Dean and I had only come on this hunt because it had been written on a page in Dad's journal; the pattern. Every five years this place gets lit up with demonic activity. Always on the same night, and all the deaths are made to look accidental. I couldn't exactly refuse to come with Dean at point blank without him exploding and demanding why.

Courtney was the reason why.

So I'd been dragged along, hoping and praying that she'd decided to move away after school, but, of course, we had to run into her, and then Dean had to start shooting at her, thinking she's the demon. And now she hates me. 

Apparently, she's hated me ever since I left.

Dean drove the Impala, staring out the window, looking for a motel for us to crash at. We'd been driving for about 6 hours straight, and Dean looked dead on his feet. Courtney had fallen asleep along with Aliese in the back about four hours ago, and every time I looked in the mirror to check that I wasn't dreaming, and that Courtney actually _was _there, Dean punched my arm. 

"Dude," he finally whispered, realizing that the punches weren't getting through to me. "what the hell is with you? Ever since we met up with this chick, you haven't said a word. And I swear man, this girl looks like she could beat the crap outta you without even trying. Where'd you meet her, and why didn't you tell me?"

"Dean," I groaned softly. "Just drop it, okay? Look, we used to have this… thing. It was a long time ago.""And you moved on," Dean said slowly, nodding as he watched the road. 

"No!" I responded quickly, but when Dean gave me The Look, I muttered. "Look, I mean, you know how it's like, Dean. We never could have… I'm a… It never would have worked, man."

Dean quirked an eyebrow at that, glancing at me from the corner of his eye. "And what about Jess?"

I started to respond before a voice broke through, "Whose Jess?" Courtney asked, and I turned in my seat to see her sitting up and rubbing her eyes sleepily. As she stared at me, I could feel the all too familiar feeling of being pulled into obliviousness, even as she stared at me with impossible awareness. I blinked and turned back, staring out the side window. I remained silent. 

Courtney sat foreword in her seat, making sure she could see my face. "Hey, whose Jess? It's a simple question, Sam. Is she your friend?"

I dimly wondered if she was bi-polar, or if the sleep had just gotten to her head. Maybe she thought she was dreaming and actually being civil to me was okay, because it didn't really matter. But when I looked back to stare at her, I was brought up short. There was something in her eyes that I hadn't noticed before, something calm and… sad. Acceptance, maybe? Although it made no sense. I hesitated, not wanting to lie to her, but fearing that she might not like the truth. The fact that maybe I had moved on after her, and just forgotten about her. "She was my… girlfriend."

Just before I turned away, I saw that flicker in her eyes wipe away completely. "Oh," was her only response. The way it came out was a mix between pain, shock and sadness. 

The car was silent then, except for Dean who was singing softly to his AC/DC cassette even as Aliese slept. Courtney didn't even glare at him for the fact that he might disturb her sister, as I knew she'd have done otherwise.

Silence. Silence. Silence. Dean singing. That alone was enough for me to want to stab a pencil through my ears. I was surprised when Courtney spoke again, surprised and happy, to tell the truth.

"So… like, where is she now? 'Cause I don't imagine her to be waiting at home for you to call every night." She spoke softly, and I had to admire her courage. If I'd come back only to find that she'd run off, married some guy and had a kid already, I wouldn't be so cool about it, but also, I thought with a heart stabbing pain, it would have been my fault for leaving in the first place. And I would have deserved it.

I internally sighed and held back the tears. "She died."

"I'm sorry," came her soft reply, and I could feel her gaze, but I didn't turn around. It was probably selfish of me, ignoring her when it wasn't her fault and she didn't deserve it.

Dean just sat in the front seat, pretending not to listen. He tapped the steering wheel in rhythm to the music, but every so often he would glance at us out of the corner of his eye. I had to resist the urge to roll my eyes. A little while after that, Dean grimaced and pulled into a dingy looking motel. I looked at it wearily. Normally, I wouldn't have minded, just thankful for a place to sleep, but with Courtney and Aliese here now… Even if Courtney still hated me, Dad taught me right, and that meant that I was still concerned for their well being. 

Dean turned the car off and opened the door. He hesitated before closing it. "Can you manage to carry sleeping beauty there, geek boy?" he asked, gesturing to the still sleeping Aliese. Courtney just stared at her hands folded in her lap. When I got out and went to open her door, she jumped and stared at me with blank eyes. Hollow and empty. My heart thundered in my chest before she shook her head and wiped her face of emotion. She got out and went to follow Dean into the main office, while I unbuckled Aliese's seat belt and picked her up gently. Where as Courtney was tall, about 5 foot 10, Aliese was only maybe 5 foot 5, so it was easy to carry her.

When I got to the main building, a middle aged couple held open the door for me, but they looked at me strangely. I could just imagine what they were thinking. Aliese was only, what, 16? I probably looked like some guy who'd just drugged this young girl. When Dean saw me walk in, he apparently got the same idea and started laughing. Courtney was talking to the girl at the counter, and when she turned back to Dean, I had to struggle to hear her words.

"She says she only has rooms with 2 beds."

Dean gave her a weird look. "Then we get two rooms," he replied as if it were the most obvious thing on the planet.

"But…" Courtney looked down at her feet, her blonde hair falling in front of her face, she slung her bag higher on her shoulder, and I suddenly remembered one of the things about her that made me fall in love with her. "But Aliese and I have no money, not till we can go to the bank, and… we couldn't accept that. It's your money. You need it more than we do."

Dean was still giving her that weird look, but I had to turn away with a smile on my face.

"Look, Dean, even if I can only just let Aliese get to bed, that'll be fine, I'll… I dunno, sleep in the car or something."

Dean was silent for a few seconds before he broke out laughing. "She's good, Sammy," he said, glancing at me. Shaking his head, he turned back to the counter and told the girl to just give him a room. Turning back to Courtney he said, "My Daddy taught me right, and it's fine. Besides, I'll just bunk with princess over there," he jerked his head at me, winking. 

Courtney gave a resigned sigh and walked out the door, with Dean close behind. "Besides," I heard him mutter. "Letting you sleep in my Impala? No way. She might get jealous."

I shook my head in disbelief and followed them till we'd found the room, which was thankfully on the first floor. It wasn't the cleanest place Dean and I had stayed at, but it certainly wasn't the dirtiest. And for that I was grateful. The room was separated into two parts, along the back wall were the bed and then closest to the door was a kitchen and bathroom, divided by a heavy curtain. I walked to the bed farthest from the door. I gently laid Aliese on the bed, and let Courtney tuck the blankets around her before Dean turned on us with blazing eyes when we were seated at the kitchen table, Courtney refusing to look at me. I'd noticed the anger again, though. Simmering just beneath whenever her eyes passed over me. And I couldn't ask her to forgive me. Not after what I'd done.

Dean just stared at us expectantly. "Well?" He prompted after we both refused to break the silence.

I glanced at Courtney but she stared stubbornly at the opposite wall. I sighed. "Dean, can we just do this in the morning? I think everyone needs to get some sleep, just to get their head straight." I looked at him pleadingly, even adding a bit of the puppy dog pout that I knew he couldn't resist.

Dean, being Dean Winchester, glared at me. He would be mad at me till morning, because he knew that I knew that he would give in. 

"Fine," he snapped, snatching his car keys off the motel table and walking to the door. I stood up immediately, in case I needed to run after him. 

"Where're you going?" I asked him hurriedly, glancing at Courtney. God, it was sorta bad enough that I had to be with her when she was mad at me, but being _alone _with her when she was pissed?

I was _so_ dead.

"Bar," Dean grunted, slamming the door shut. I waited until the sounds of his engine had all but disappeared before I turned around. 

Just as I feared, Courtney was out of her seat, standing not two feet behind me, glaring like a wild animal, her green eyes flashing with pain. I didn't even try to stop her when her fist came flying at my face. And let me just say, angry girls who know how to throw a punch are _evil_. It probably hurt more than any other time I'd been punched before. Even by Dean. Still, her shoulders shook with rage and I could see the angry tears building up in her eyes. I wanted to give her a hug, I wanted to hold her and tell her that I was sorry, I wanted to kiss her and just forget about it all…

But I couldn't. Not anymore. Not after what I'd already done.

"I'm sorry," was all I could say, and it would never be enough. The whole right side of my face was numb but throbbing, but I really could care less, because at that moment Courtney threw herself at me, finally letting go of her tears, and sobbing into my shirt. Tentatively, as if in a dream, I put my arms around her while she hugged my middle and cried. This would probably never happen again, and while that crushed me, I was just glad that I had this time. Even if it was only for a few moments.

One thing she kept muttering over and over again. The same sentence, and it took me a while to even figure out she was speaking the words were so garbled. "_I thought you were dead, I thought you were dead, I thought you were dead._" She repeated.

When she finally pulled away, she stared at the ground in shame. At least she wasn't that angry anymore, I thought with a sad sigh. 

"You can have the other bed, if you want." Courtney whispered, fidgeting her feet. I wasn't used to seeing this side of Courtney, the ashamed, broken side of her. And I knew that I'd probably never get to see it again.

I shook my head. "No, you need it more than I do." I replied, moving out of the way so that she could walk through to the other room.

She smiled wistfully, and let out a small, musical giggle. "Can we just not fight tonight? Look, we can both use the bed. Its not like we're going to be doing anything other than sleeping." She blushed.

I blushed too. But what the hell, she was in a good mood and I was going to go with it. I just nodded and watched her walk into the other room and crawl into bed, fully clothed. She lay facing her sister, her face etched with worry. When I crawled into the other side of the bed, choosing to lay on top of the covers, I heard Courtney whisper, "Goodnight, Sam."

"Goodnight, Courtney." I replied softly, yearning to say more, but as soon as my head hit the pillow, I was half way to dream land. Courtney said one thing before the darkness closed over me.

"I never stopped loving you, Sam."

But I was already too far gone.

* * *

The next morning when I woke up, the other side of the bed was empty. I thought it had all been a dream, and that I'd woken up from a major concussion or something, but then I saw Aliese. She was still asleep. God, that girl could sleep through the Apocalypse!

I could hear the shower running, and I up got to go check if Dean had brought food home with him last night. It must have been like a day since I had last eaten. I found Dean sitting at the table staring at the screen of a laptop. Occasionally, he'd click on something, then go back to reading. I stared at the laptop for a second before going to sit down across from Dean.

"Whose computer is that?" I asked, staring at the blue laptop. 

"Courtney's," he replied, glancing up at me. 

I raised my eye brow. Where the hell did she get the laptop from?

"I swear, Sammy, that girl is more prepared for anything than we are. Have you seen some of the things she keeps in that bag of hers, man? It's like an occult shop just by itself!" Dean announced in awe, shutting off the computer and staring at me with wide eyes.

I tilted my head. "Since when were you in her bag?"

Dean glared sharply at me. "She was showing me, 'cause I asked if she'd be ready if we needed her to be."

"Needed her for what?" I exclaimed lightly, staring when Dean suddenly got fidgety and smiled cheekily.

"I… I was thinking maybe she could help us, man. You know, just for a bit."

My eyes widened. "Help us with what?" At Dean's silence, I realized. "With hunting…? Oh, god, Dean, what did you do?"

Before Dean could respond, there was a horrified scream that emanated from the bathroom. All of a sudden, Courtney, clad only in a skimpy motel towel, rushed out of the bathroom holding what looked to be a piece of fabric. On closer inspection, I realizes it was a skirt. A really, really short skirt.

"What the hell is _this_?" Courtney shrieked incredulously, staring at Dean. "I told you to get some clothes and you get _this_?!? This doesn't even count for anything!"

Dean gave his famous innocent, cheeky smile and said, "Well, I've seen girls wear less than that," before turning to stare at me, expecting me to back him up. I stared at him with wide eyes.

"Dude, she's a girl. Not a stripper."

Courtney stared at me, her eyes wide with anger. I tried not to stare at her. "Oh thanks, Sam. That… that means a lot, coming from you." She snapped sarcastically. Then she returned to glaring at Dean. He just shrugged and chuckled nervously. With that she gave a frustrated, muffled shriek. "Why do I get stuck with the idiot? Why?" I heard her mutter and she turned her back and walked back into the bathroom. 

Dean punched my arm as he noticed my stare. Which happened to be in the general area lower than her back.

"Dude, stop it. You're making me sick, seeing my brother lusting after a girl." Dean said mock disgust, shaking his head, turning back to me. "God that girls scary. Hey, I was going to ask you something."

I glanced at him and grunted to show that I'd heard him.

"Dude, you think she'd let me date Aliese if I asked?" He asked, staring at the closed bathroom door.

I stared at my brother in disgust. "Dude, she's like 10 years younger than you are. No. And I think if you even thought about touching her sister, she'd rip your heart out… Or worse."

Dean flinched and shuttered at the image his mind provided. Which was a very disturbing and detailed one. Then his face turned pensive. "Aliese is only 16? Really? Well, that sucks." He then pretended to pout as he got up to pour himself coffee. For a second, I was confused. Since when did we get coffee at any other place than diners and gas stops?

Dean noticed my stare and he sighed and rolled his eyes, motioning at the closed door. "Miss Prissy here said that we needed an actual breakfast, and that I wasn't allowed to say no. So this morning, at four or five, she made me drive to the store to buy food and clothes. Man, I'm telling you, that girl scares the shit outta me."

Through the door, Courtney yelled, "What did you say, darling?"

Dean's eyes widened and he stared at Sam. "Nothing, honey." He called back, glaring at me as I doubled over laughing. Dimly, it hurt that it was Dean and Courtney bickering, like she and I used to, but I knew I deserved it, so I shut up.

Aliese stumbled into the kitchen a few minutes later, and after Courtney came out of the bathroom, fully dressed in a pair of skinny jeans and a loose fitting blue top, and checked to make sure that Aliese's shoulder wasn't infected, they traded spots; Aliese in the bathroom and Courtney standing over the oven, preparing to make… whatever it was that she was making.

I knew this was it; no more avoiding the truth. And Dean wouldn't stop until he'd lived through the whole story. Stupid, stubborn Winchester gene. Courtney at least got an excuse not to have to talk face to face with Dean. 

Me, no such luck. 

Dean put on his serious face (I had to keep from laughing) and crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair. "So, who wants to start out little therapy session?"

Courtney just glared at him over her shoulder and Dean turned to me, his eyes expectant. I honestly didn't know where to begin.

"Okay, so we'll play twenty questions. Sam starts." Dean announced after receiving another death glare from Courtney. 

I remained silent. No way in hell was I gonna have to explain this on my own.

"Awkward…" Dean muttered, rocking in his chair. "Okay… Or I guess I will. Okay… Sam, list all the people you've dated since meeting Courtney."

I stared at him incredulously. What the hell was this supposed to do? Whatever, if he wanted to know, I'd humor him. Courtney's shoulders tensed as soon as the question was asked.… "Just Jess." I said softly, staring at the wall.

Dean gave a smile and clapped his hands. "Now we're getting somewhere. What about you, Courtney? Any boyfriends?"

Her back was still towards me so I couldn't see the expression on her face, but her shoulders shook and when she answered her voice was shaky. "No. No, Aliese is enough of a pain in the ass as I can handle at the moment."

Dean turned back to me, a cheeky smile on his face. "I like this girl," he mock whispered. "So, Sammy boy, when-"

"Are you seriously going to play this game, Dean?" Courtney said abruptly, putting down the knife she'd just been using with a little more force than necessary. She spun around to face us and I was shocked to see the tears threatening to spill over in her eyes.

"Well, are you ready to talk about it then?" Dean asked seriously.

I could almost feel the fire when Courtney directed her gaze at me and began to speak, her words coming short and hard. I could tell that it took a lot of effort just to get them out.

"I was 16. It happened almost four years ago. Aliese and I moved into a new house with our adopted parents, Lacie and Jeff. I… I was having a hard time at school, and I kept on having nightmares. Every morning when I woke up, all the pictures of my friends would be lying on the floor and it looked like things had been thrown around my room while I was asleep, and my first thought was a poltergeist-"

Here Dean stopped Courtney with a "wait, what?!?" and even I looked at her strangely. 

"Why did you think it was a poltergeist?" I asked wearily, trying to cope with the new info she was feeding out. "Why did you think it was anything to do with the supernatural?"

Here, Courtney's eyes widened and she clamped her mouth shut, looking as if she'd spoken too much. But at my pleading puppy dog look (it works most of the time) the words I guess just slipped out. "Because… Because when I was four, I saw my little brother murdered by the monster in my closet. He was Aliese's twin, and I was there and I couldn't stop it. And I thought it had come back to kill me and Aliese."

I didn't question the tears anymore, but the story was too familiar. Too familiar, because it was _our _story; Dean and mine. Dean realized this too, and I stared at him in horror.

"Courtney," I said frantically, standing up and walking towards her. "Has Aliese ever shown any signs of anything… unusual? Like… Moving things?" Courtney looked lost, and I tried again, desperately. "Or getting people to think things?"

This got a reaction. A reaction so big that I thought Courtney might punch me again. "How the hell do you know about that?" She hissed, subtly placing her hand on the knife she'd been using earlier.

But when she said that, everything changed.

This wasn't normal. 

"Courtney, what can Aliese do?" I asked, placing my hand on her shoulder as Dean stood back and to my right for support.

"I can read minds."

Courtney stared at Aliese in panic. "Aliese, stop it. Come on, get your things and we're leaving." she tried to walk past me, but I grabbed her arm and spun her towards me. I had to duck to dodge her fist but she didn't struggle. "Let go,"

Trying to think of some way to help the situation, I decided to tell the truth. "Courtney, I can see things. I see visions. I'm just like Aliese. When I was six months old, our mom," I gestured to myself and Dean, "She died in a house fire. Dean was four years old and he managed to get us out. Courtney, this is very important, what exactly killed your brother?"

Aliese gasped at this, and I fought to stare at Courtney and Courtney only as her face flickered between unconcealed rage and terror.

"I saw a woman. And she strangled my brother while he was sleeping. I don't know what she was, but she…" Courtney's voice sounded strangled and weak. "She pinned my mom to the ceiling. And I could only get Aliese out before the house burned up. My mom and dad didn't make it."

Dean and I exchanged horrified glances. No… It couldn't have been yellow eyes… but then what was it? What other demon did that?

"And then I started seeing things."

My head snapped back in her direction, and I let her arm go out of shock. "What?" I asked stupidly, my brow furrowing.

Courtney's eyes were distant and far away, and she looked like she would drop at any moment. "I started seeing things… visions, after my brother died. And when Aliese could talk, she started to tell me what other people were thinking. She would answer questions that were never asked. Aloud, at least."

So… This made no sense. They had their psychic abilities since they were young? Dean didn't look convinced. But there was something else growing in me as I stared at Courtney's prone form. Not disbelief, but anger. "And you never thought to tell me this before?"

That one sentence was all Courtney needed to snap back into reality and her old self. "Oh, I'm sorry Mr Honest that I didn't tell you that I saw things, because I thought you might think I was a freak and take off, but, oh look." Her face hardened. "You didn't need an excuse, now did you?"

"Courtney," I growled, taking a step closer to her. "It was a hunt. My Dad and I taught you because you begged us to, and you knew that I would have to leave-"

"Begged?!?" She shouted, staring at me. "Excuse _me_, but I'm pretty sure it was you that started asking me to help on your little hunting trip." She spat, venom leaking from her words.

"If you didn't want to help us, why didn't you walk away?" I yelled back at her.

Courtney's eyes turned ice cold and her voice was so low and harsh that they tore at my soul. "If you knew you were leaving, why did you let me fall in love with you?"

The next few moments in my mind were blank, and I when I noticed the cold and the wind, I realized that I'd stormed out of the motel and was standing in the middle of the parking lot. Aliese's timid voice sounded from behind me. 

"She doesn't mean it, you know. As much as it hurts you to hear, it hurts her even more to say."

I sighed and replied, "I'm not so sure that's true." Because I couldn't believe anything anymore painful than I was feeling right now. It felt like someone had take a sledgehammer to my heart and the cut up my soul.

Aliese smiled sadly and stood beside me. "I know my sister. She's just trying to cover up the pain with her mask and let everyone think she's fine. She wants me to be so naïve, sometimes."

"Sounds like Dean," I replied, staring out at the sky line and dullness of the morning. "They're so much alike sometimes that it scares me."

"But that's why you love her," Aliese said softly, laying a hand on my arm.

And for that one second, where I couldn't see anything more than her hand on my arm and her blonde hair waving in the breeze, I could have sworn that it was Jessica, but then I blinked and her eyes came into focus; hazel eyes, not blue. I sighed and was about to respond when I felt it. That feeling of being watched. I took a step foreword, looking around. 

I turned around to tell Aliese to get the hell back to the room, but when I turned, she wasn't there.

Aliese screamed.


	4. Reveal

**Chapter 4 - Reveal**

**Dean **

As soon as the scream had stopped echoing through the room, Courtney was out of her seat and out of the motel room, even forgetting to turn off the stove. I followed no more than a step behind.

"Aliese?" Courtney shouted frantically, running to the centre of the parking lot. "Aliese?! Where are you?" Her eyes were panicked and her hands shook. Her gaze darted between anything and everything that she could see, and I realized all this even while my eyes mimicked the motion.

"Sammy?" Still there was only silence. "This isn't funny, Sam!"

_No, no, no, _I thought, panicking. Not again. I wouldn't loose my brother again.

"ALIESE!" Courtney screamed, desperately, sobs wracking her body. My body wanted to do the same thing, but I put on my emotionless mask and stood strong. Like Sammy would want me to be. "No, no, no… Sam. You better keep her fucking safe!" She yelled out, not directing the statement to anyone.

The fear and terror running through me had no place to go, so instead, I directed it in anger at Courtney.

"Who the hell are you?" I spun around and faced Courtney, trying to pretend that I didn't notice her tears. "Sam and I were fine until you showed up. Hell, for all I know your some demon sent to kidnap Sam, because he'd trust you! I should kill you right now." I growled harshly at her, and I could see the immediate change in her expression. Her eyes which had before been flooded with helpless pain, now held glowing green fire, and although I was still angry as hell at her, she still fucking scared the shit out of me.

Her eyes narrowed until they were slits and they flashed warningly. I almost flinched and took a step back, but my anger was making me bold and stupid.

"You do that," she hissed, glaring at me with hate filled green orbs. "And you see how well that goes over with my sister when you find her; and Sam, for that matter."

I hated the fact that she could bring Sam into her side of the argument, but I hated even more knowing that she was right. It had been one thing to take him away from Jess before he could say goodbye, but if I killed Courtney, Sam would never be able to look at me again. And that thought was all it took for the simmering rage steadily building up inside me to suddenly drain away in a second.

We were both after the same thing; our younger siblings, with that I could identify with her, and if the demons had taken Sam and Courtney's little sister, then there was no telling what would be happening right now. Stupid fucking demons! What did they want with Sam so bad?!?

I just couldn't lose Sam, not after all this…

_Just sit tight, Sammy. I'm not gonna let you die. Not like this. _

* * *

It took a little over 5 minutes to have all our stuff packed, check out and jump in the Impala. Courtney was still beyond pissed off at me, both for this mornings'… situation, and threatening her. I was smart enough to stay out of her way, but when we were shut in the Impala, all I could do was watch the road and sit nervously in my seat.

I wasn't so good with girls. Well, not girls that I actually had to spend time with, must have noticed my fidgeting, because she turned flat eyes on me.

"What, cat got your tongue? Or is it just the fact that I'm the only girl you've spent longer than 12 hours with without sleeping with?" Her voice was so flat and she sounded so sure, that I froze at the words. Damn, this girl was good.

"Dude, that is so not true," _and you know it,_ I replied, forgetting for a second that it wasn't Sam I was talking too.

_Sam… _

She stared at me, and it was really starting to freak me out, before, ever so slowly, a smile slide across her face. A mocking, evil smile.

_You're an idiot, Sam! _I silently cursed him for his big mouth, but I also glared in the mirror at Courtney's triumphant smile, cursing myself for falling into her evil, psychic girlish trap.

_Stupid girls and their evil mind control powers…_I grumbled in frustration.

Courtney smirked.

Oh, hell no was I letting her get away with this. I mean, I was a Winchester! One thing you learn about Winchester's is:

We always win. Unless…

"Well, when we find Sam, at least you can slap him while pretending to be mad when really… You just want to make out with him." I smirked as the expression of triumph froze on her face and turned sour. But that look, that, _oh you are so dead,_ look she was now projecting at me made me back down.

… Unless we're up against scary ass girls who know how to use a gun.

We lapsed back into silence.

I was going to wait until we at least reach city limits before I tried to call Bobby; maybe he had some idea of where the things (whatever they were) had taken Sam and not too far, because I don't think Courtney would be patient enough to drive it, and I really, _really_ hated flying.

Like, more than anything.

Unfortunately, the next city wasn't for another 72 miles. Great. I sped up as fast as I dared making my baby go, but it still wasn't fast enough for me. The constant chant in my head was making me go slowly crazy.

_Sam, Sam, Sammy…_

"You can ask if you want, Dean. I don't care anymore." Courtney said it more to break the silence than to actually remind me of my burning curiosity, but I was glad.

Another thing we had in common. The need to get away from our inner demons (hypothetical demons).

"Okay…" I said awkwardly, looking any where but directly at Courtney. "When did you and geek boy meet?" It was the first question that had popped into my head, the simplest and easiest to answer.

It was the first time I'd seen her smile; actually smile without the hidden pain. It was kind and soft and fond, and I could sort of understand why my idiot of a little brother had fallen for this girl. "It was the week before I turned 16. Sam would've been… 18 or 19. It was in Spring; May. You know about the poltergeist, or…" Here she looked uncertain. "Well, your dad and Sam called it a… Oh, god… it had some weird ass name… Atrapas- something."

Ii clicked in my head. "Atrapasueños? A Dream Catcher." For the first time, I _really_ looked at Courtney. Not just the once over glance, but I _looked_. "That was the last hunt Sam ever went on." I told her, trying to keep the suspicion from entering my voice.

A Dream Catcher. Sam's last hunt. Courtney. I was silently glad that I'd never been there to witness that certain hunt.

And the fact that Dream Catcher's only haunted people whose lives constantly held death and pain.

"You?" I sputtered incredulously. "You had a dream catcher after you?"

"Yeah, why?" Courtney responded, her brow furrowing in confusion.

"No reason." I snorted, and stared out the windshield in shocked silence. "You just don't seem like the wallow is solitary silence type."

Her whispered reply shocked me to the core and I knew it wasn't meant for me to hear, so I didn't respond. "You'd be surprised."

Courtney had launched back into her story, and I struggled to pay attention. "… When Sam and John showed up, I knew something was wrong. I'd seen them before, in my… visions, and I knew that if they tried killing whatever was haunting me, one of them was going to die."

That news came like a brick smashing over my head. Sam or Dad could have _died_?!?

"The next day, after I'd told them that it wasn't a good idea and I thought they should just leave town, in my attempt to save their lives, I had another vision. In this one, they both died."

And now I knew the reason she'd never told Sam about her visions; even right now, I thought she was a little bit crazy. "So, you run to the rescue and save their lives and you and Sam go off into the happily-ever-after?"

Courtney gave me a sharp glare, cutting me down till I almost felt like she could see inside of me. "No. They came back, asking if I'd help them with their hunt because I seemed so closely tied with it. The… Dream Catcher. In my vision, I'd said no.

"So I said yes."

Those words shocked me. I, the great, amazing Dean Winchester, was completely lost. Yes? Just saying yes had been able to change the future, save his families lives? What if that was what it was like all the time, through every hunt I'd ever been on? Just say something different here, walk a different way back, and you'd just saved two life had prepared me with the fact that it wasn't that simple.

"Sam trained me, taught me how to hold a gun and shoot it, and taught me close-combat and the proper way to handle a weapon. John tried to teach me, but…" Courtney hesitated giving a short nervous laugh, another soft smile flickering across her face. "Let's just say he wasn't that patient with me."

I believed her story, at least, about 95% of it, but the last bit I didn't get. "That hunt lasted less than three weeks. Are you telling me that Sam managed to train you in _three weeks_?"

Courtney gave a simple nod.

I sighed and laughed. Only Sam would be able to do that. _I'll give you that, Sammy. I'll give you that. _

When Courtney didn't continue, I poked her knee, trying to get her attention back. "Oh, right." I snorted. "I'll skip over the chick flick parts. John probably told you about how the hunt went, and what happened. Cornered it, shot it with some rock salt, Sammy said a few special chants and, gone. But the next day… so were they."

That part confused me. Sam leaving without even saying goodbye? "Why?"

She gave a half glare and muttered, "I'm not fricking Google search, here. You'll have to ask Sam himself… if we find them."

"What do you mean if? _If_ is not even part of that sentence."

"I _really_ hope you're right about that…" The sentence was whispered, defiantly not meant for me to hear, and so I pretended to ignore it.

Even after the whole story, the questions bubbled up.

_Goddamn it, Sam. Always gone when I need you. _

* * *

"Bobby…" I hesitated, the phone my ear. I stood out side the Impala parked in front of a small diner, Courtney sitting perfectly still inside the car. "I… Uh, we need your help."

"_Dean? What'd you boys manage to yourselves stuck into this time?" _

"Um… Bobby… Sammy's missing."

The line was silent for a few seconds before Bobby let off a string of profanities. _"What the hell happened, Dean?!? After all this time you've been protecting your brother, and now you manage to lose him? What kind of brother are you?" _

My nerves, already stretched to breaking point ever since I'd realized Sam was gone, had now been pulled too far. "Damn it, Bobby! You're supposed to help us, not make me feel worse than I already do! Don't you think those thoughts have already passed through my head? And a million more, most even worse. Don't you dare try to blame this on me, Bobby, I'm doing the best I can."

I could hear Bobby sigh and his voice was resigned. _"Alright, boy. Now, just… start from the beginning, you keep saying 'we' and 'us.' Who's there with you?" _

I glanced at Courtney in the car, but she just stared at me and motioned for me to hurry up.

"Well, actually… That's a funny story." I chuckled nervously. "We might have met up with one of Sam's long lost girlfriends, and she might have decided to tag along."

Once again the line was silent, and all Bobby could respond with was a simple, _"What?"_

I sighed. "My words exactly, Bobby. Hey, listen; I need you to check something for me…"

**Courtney **

_Don't panic, don't panic, don't panic…_

Panicking! Too late.

_Fuck, Aliese, why did you have to do that?_

Luckily, Dean chose that moment to climb back in the Impala and start the engine. He'd been driving too slowly before. He needed to hurry up. His music started up and I glared at him.

"Shut that off," I growled as he turned up the dial. His green eyes mirrored surprise before he narrowed them at me, and turned it louder.

"Okay, let me explain this: My car, I'm driving, my music." He said slowly, daring me to contradict him.

_Screw you_, I seethed silently. "Then let me drive. You're going to slow anyway."

It wasn't a serious question, and I could guess at his reaction, but it was funny all the same. The '_are you fucking crazy?_' look just about sent me into hysterics, but instead I just quirked my lips upward and tilted my head pleadingly. I knew if I kept going, sooner or later he would give in, just for the sake of Sam, but I wouldn't let him go that far. I just had to tease him enough that his anger would make him go faster, and then he could ditch me.

But for now, he needed my help. And he knew it.

Grumbling, he just put the car into drive and peeled out of the lot, darting through traffic. I did have to admit, Dean was a kickass driver, but my thoughts kept me from announcing that fact.

_Let's just find Aliese and Sam, and…_

The problem was I didn't know what was after that. My friends, my parents, everyone I'd known was now gone. If Aliese and Sam were gone too… Then all I had was Dean. My last connection to Sam.

Not that I thought of Dean like that. He was nothing more than my… than Sam's brother, but he knew more about me than anyone other than Aliese and Sam at the moment.

And that thought scared me.

_Who's going to be there to tell me that I'm not hallucinating, Aliese? Who's going to keep me from losing my mind?_

_Sam…_

"_Here, you hold the gun like this." He said, taking the gun and showing me the proper grip. _

"_So… like this?" I held it up, and without warning pulled the trigger. One. Two. Three. Bang, bang, bang. The recoil made me jump, but I was pleased that I hadn't dropped the gun._

"_Holy fucking christ!" Sam exclaimed, staring at me. My heart dropped. Had I done it wrong? Did I hit something? What did I do?_

Stupid girl,_ my mind chastised,_ what don't you do wrong?

_I managed to keep the tears from falling, but when I glanced at Sam's face, he wasn't staring at me. He was staring at our makeshift target; all three shots were within 10cm of each other, evenly spaced._

_I gaped. Huh. I stared down at the gun in wonder and giggled. "That was fun."_

_Sam stared at me with wide eyes, but for the first time, they shone with something other than patience._

_Respect._

"So, do you want to know what Bobby said or not?" Dean's voice broke through the fog, and I glanced around me, startled.

"Sure," I responded, sitting back and leaning my head against the window.

When I closed my eyes, only brief flickers of Dean's voice got through to me. Something about a "city two states over" that had experienced "a rapid increase in demonic activity." I had the urge to point out that he'd used his 'big boy' words, but my head was so heavy that even staying awake was becoming a difficult feat. Awareness was slipping away from me, and the harder I grabbed at it, the faster it was pulled.

Awareness was all I could hold on to. If I let it go, my visions would take hold, and this kind of feeling, the going deeper and deeper into myself, had only ever happened to me twice before.

Once, the day before my parents, my birth parents, died. I watched them burn when I was four years old. That was the day I realized that life was a cruel, manipulative asshole.

The second time was the day Sam left, and I could see that death hovered over his soul. That day I learned the true definition of heartbreak.

I'd spent the past few years never knowing if death had descended him or if he was even still alive. You can't even begin to imagine how that felt… and how much I loathed myself for letting it hurt me. If he didn't care about me enough to even say goodbye, why should I give a crap what happened after he'd left? Obviously he didn't share my feelings.

But I loved him. I still did, and it hurt so much that I couldn't begin to describe it.

Just as the last shard of consciousness threatened to depart from my mind, I could feel the difference. Slowly, piece by piece, I tried to build my alertness back up. The road. Something was different about it, and… we were going slower. Much too slow. Almost barely moving. Were we here already? I panicked, stretching that final distance, my eyes snapped open. "What's happening?"

Dean just glanced over at me, and I realized that the sky had darkened considerably. "You were passed out over there." Dean snapped sarcastically. "You seemed pretty out of it. You okay there, Princess?

"Whoa, Prince Charming. Stop with the concern, its making me sick." I hissed back. _God, all I did was ask a stupid question…_

_Sam and Aliese, Sam and Aliese. _I mentally chanted, and added just for good measure._ Sam will get mad if you kill Dean now, just let him drive. Calm down._

"Nah," Dean said suddenly, smiling. "I'll stick with 'trusty side kick.' You can be Prince Charming and go save Princess Sam from the flesh eating ogres."

"Gah," I said, pulling a face. "…Thanks for that lovely picture you just painted in my mind."

"What one? Of Sam in a dress? Or you wearing tights?" Dean snickered.

I glared my best; _you better hope you're alive tomorrow morning,_ look. "You're an asshole, you know that?"

But that conversation still didn't answer my question as to _why the hell we were parked on the shoulder of the road_. "Uh… Dean? Did I miss something, or did you just forget to get gas the last time we stopped?"

_Well, so much for getting along with your brother, Sam. Oh, can't you imagine Christmas and holidays…_

"Uh…" Without turning to look at me, Dean got out of the car and popped the hood, staring in concentration at the engine. I unbuckled my seatbelt and stepped out of the car, making sure my Beretta was tucked inside my belt. Probably weird for a girl to be carrying a gun, but I'd seen one to many horror movies, and I'd lived through a few real ones too. Night had descended, we were stuck on the middle of some random highway god knows where, and Dean was staring at his car in bewilderment. Which told me he had absolutely no idea what was wrong. _Again with the obsessed movie thoughts._

Just as that thought passed through me, IT hit me. That dizzying wave of confusion and frustration that always signaled the beginning of my visions.

"_Need help with that, mister?" …… "fix this up in no time…"_

_BANG! Dean drops to the ground, blood leaking from his chest…_

"What the hell?!?" I hadn't dropped to the ground this time, but I was still on my knees being held up by Dean's surprisingly fragile grasp.

"You… died…" I gasped out, but as Dean's eyes widened in shock and surprise, a voice blocked out the beginning of his frantic questioning.

"You okay there, little lady?" The voice had a faint southern accent, and I immediately glanced up in horror, my eyes widening till it felt like my face would spit. Dean didn't miss my reaction.

"She's fine," Dean said slowly, getting to his feet. I subtly tried to pass him my gun, seeing as he was standing in front of me, but as the figures eyes peered around Dean's form, I shuddered.

The guy looked to be in his late 20's, with sandy blond hair and piercing grey eyes. Eyes that, for a moment, had flashed a pure, sinister black. He gestured at the popped hood and said gruffly, "Need help with that, mister?"

I took a sharp breath, and Dean glanced back at me in worry. I just wiped my face clear and gave my best 'I'm fine,' smile. I waited the moment that Dean and the demon took to walk to the front of the car to clear my head. No, Dean was not going to die tonight. I got up and pulled the gun from my belt, feeling the familiar warmth of the grip beneath my hands.

"Well, we'll fix this up-" he began, rubbing his hand faintly over his coat pocket, feeling for the protection of his gun.

My gun was up before he could blink. Dean had run to the front seat of the Impala and pulled out his sawed off shotgun in about three seconds. I held my gun up higher on the demons temple.

"We want answers," I hissed calmly. "And we want them now."

His eyes showed his indecision; should he give in, or try and make a break for it? But as I pull tightened my finger on the trigger and Dean pointed the shotgun at his chest, he weighed his options.

Ha. We win.

"Okay, okay! What do you want to know?"


	5. Torture

Chapter 5 – Torture

**Aliese**

**  
**I screamed. I screamed and I screamed… I screamed for Courtney, for help, for someone to save me, I screamed till I was blue in the face.

It just made their smiles grow wider and harsher. I shuddered at the expression in their pitch black eyes; hunger. They laughed and mocked me. I cried and I screamed. It wasn't enough to help me, and demons had no mercy. They only had torture and greed.

I cried out again as they dragged the blade across my stomach. "GAH! Ah…" I cried out breathlessly, trying to shield my body from the assault. I pulled at the restraints and whimpered as they broke through the skin, causing a sudden fire to travel up my arm. It burned like flesh held over an open flame, and I squeezed my eyes tight to hold back the tears.

Where the fuck was Courtney?!?

I'd never felt this kind of pain before. Nothing ever would be able to surpass it, and that thought freaked the hell out of me. Pain like this… It wasn't something imaginable in my world. Or at least, what used to be my world. _This _was my life now. This thing of horror and nightmare-ish creatures. I hadn't chosen this, but I was suddenly becoming a key component in it.

I was chained to some kind of giant slab of stone, my dirty brown hair pillowing my head, and the restraints were strapped around my ankles, waist and neck. If I tried to struggle, I couldn't breathe. I could taste blood, and I could feel the wounds along my body; more than five ran across my torso, I could feel a jagged, gaping would along my right leg, and they'd removed my bandages from the bullet wound. They then poured salt in it, and pushed it deeper it the ragged gash with a serrated edged knife.

_"Let's see how _your_ kind likes it," _they'd hissed, smirking maliciously.

But now, they had left. For how long, I didn't know, but I was alone. "Courtney," I pleaded to no one. "Courtney, _where are you?_" I whimpered. It was dark. Darker than I was used to it ever being before, and I was scared. It was like being scared of the thing in my closet all over again, but this time, Courtney wasn't here to hug me and tell me that it wasn't there, that I would be safe. That I was imagining things.

She couldn't tell me that she'd protect me, and even if she could, it would be a lie.  
A groan and shuffling sound in the far corner of the room behind my head roused me from my thoughts. I tried to repress the shiver that traveled down my spine and clamped my mouth shut against the bile that rose up in my throat. _Please, please no…_

_  
_"Ah… Oh god, my head hurts…" The hoarse voice groaned.

The relief I felt was so profound and moving that I felt my heart swell. "Sam!" I gasped, the emotion finally letting my tears spill over. "Sam, where are we? I can't see you…"

"Aliese? What… What happened…?" Another groan. "All I can remember is yelling at Courtney, and taking off… Fuck."

I just stayed quiet; the only sound echoing was my muffled sobs.

"Hey, Aliese… Oh, god. What happened to you? Are you alright?" I could hear Sam struggling with the chains that no doubt tied him down, but when he gave a frustrated grunt, I wasn't surprised. When I didn't answer though, Sam asked frantically, "Hey, Aliese, I'm right here. We'll get through this. And besides, if you get hurt, Courtney'll kill me. I promise, they'll find us."

That last comment made me give a wail of despair as I felt the heat and pain flood back over me, threatening to drag me under. Sam tried for a while to sooth me, telling me it was alright, telling me I had to stay quiet. I bit my lip after that point, and cried silently.

"Is there anyway you can move so you can see me?" Sam asked delicately, and I had to trust in that cool calmness that he was projecting. If I couldn't trust in that, I was dead. I had to contain myself, compose myself enough that I could feel hope. Like Sam.

_But Sam wasn't the one that just got gouged at and mutilated_; the constant voice in my head reminded me. _He's not the one in pain._

_  
_But I didn't know that, so I wiggled a bit and tried to turn my head, despite the chain that wound tightly around my neck. "Can't…" I gasped as the movement aggravated my shoulder wound and caused the blood to race faster from the open gouges in the flesh of my stomach. "I'm… stuck..."

"Okay, uh…" The sudden vulnerability in Sam's voice pushed me on, and through a moment of agony when I turned my head; the rusted chain scratching along my throat, I gave a high pitched grunt and suddenly, I could see everything to my right. Which included Sam chained to a chair which was facing straight at me, and an identical stone slab placed a foot apart from mine.

Even without glancing at Sam I knew what I was seeing, but Sam's eyes confirmed it; desperation, helplessness.

Regret.

And though the sudden tears caused my vision to go blurry, I gave a watery chuckle and stared at the stone; engraved with runes and symbols that I had no clue what they meant. I knew the purpose of them, though, and that purpose horrified me.

A ritual. A _sacrificial _ritual. And guess who gets to be lucky enough to be one of the ones on the table?

Bingo! Me. Please, give the participant a prize.

"Sam…" I whispered, ready to break. "What's going to happen to me, Sam?" Just as he was about to begin his 'everything is going to be fine; just stay strong' speech, I interrupted with, "Tell me the truth. I don't want to die with people still lying to me."

I treasured the few seconds of silence before the impending truth. I treasured it, because for that moment, it was all I had. For that moment, I could pretend that life was going to be fine, Courtney would come and rescue us, Sam and she could get back together, and I would fall in love and have a life. In that one moment, I could fantasize and savor the purity and happiness of it.

In that one moment, I knew I didn't want to die.

Eventually though, that one moment passed, and Sam shook his head. "I don't know, Aliese."

I knew he wasn't lying, and so I blinked back the tears, swallowed the pathetic sobs, and I tried to hold myself with as much dignity as was left in me. I tried to smile, I wanted to laugh, I wanted to pack a life time of pain, of happiness and love, into this small amount of time.

That was when I accepted it. Not as something that would come easily, let alone willingly to me, but as something that would just… _happen_. My life was slowly seeping out of me. The crimson outlining my body as it settled around me. _Courtney… Stay away. I don't want you to have to see this._

_  
_Sam was tied, I was tied. My only hope was Courtney and Dean, but even if they did manage to find us, they still had to worry about the however many demons outside the room Sam and I were locked in. I'd only seen two, but that didn't mean there wasn't more than that.

Trying to break the silence that was now overwhelming me, I said softly, "You're an idiot, you know, that Sam?" It was something that had been running through my head ever since I'd realized who exactly Sam was; the guy that Courtney had been all giggly over.

"What?" Was Sam's oh-so-intelligent response, and I snorted before coughing as the chain weighed down on my throat.

"You're an idiot for letting her go," he didn't need me to specify who exactly I was talking about. "You know, you're just lucky that she never stopped loving you." My head lolled to the side heavily, my thoughts forming useless nothings. And just because I needed something more than the tense and anxious atmosphere, I added, "Hell, you should be lucky she fell in love with you in the first place."

"Oh yeah, cause _I'm_ so lucky," Sam retorted sarcastically, keeping his voice low. I could still hear the pain in his voice though. Would it be possible to mentally slap someone from across the room? I really wanted to try.

I hesitated, not knowing where to begin. I would stay strong; just to prove to Courtney that I could. Maybe, if Sam got out, he could tell her… I tried to pull away from those thoughts, just as the door hinges creaked open. It was too late for me to turn my head back, so I just stared at Sam as he stared past me.

"Ah, Sammy's awake. Hello, Sammy, how's Dean doing? But… I'll know soon enough." That voice, that voice… First Sadie, now this?

It was all part of their game plan, their attempt to torture us even more, and the worst thing for us was the fact that it was working. I twisted my head around, wincing as I felt the blood bead along and down my neck. "Markus," I whispered sadly, staring at the oh so familiar boy in front of me. Instead of staring into hazel eyes though, I just saw continuous black holes; never ending.

Demon/Markus stared at me with his ever broadening smirk, and I glared into his amused onyx eyes. "Nope, not… quite." He said slowly, tilting his head. "Well now, although this is one of the more… attractive of my meat suits, I have to say. His memories are far more impressive." Markus's eyes, the demons eyes, widened in mock surprise. "Is it true that this… _Markus_ is the first boy you kissed? Oh well now, doesn't that make it all the more tragic." The body snatcher smiled maliciously.

"You're not Markus." I snapped viciously, turning my head to stare at the ceiling. I glanced at Sam, but he was glaring at the demon with so much hatred that even I flinched minutely. "You're an evil asshole, that's what you are."

"Oh, come now," the demon said, stepping forward and circling me. His hand trailed along my skin, and I could feel my flesh crawl.

"Don't touch her," Sam snapped violently, pulling at the restraints; they clanged together, and the sound reminded me of wind chimes. Courtney made me a wind chime when we were little… "What the hell do you want?"

The liquid rust seeped under my fingers and I stared down at my body in interest, thoughts lost. Blood. I furrowed my brow. There was so much blood. Where was it coming from? I struggled to move and gasped at the white hot agony that ripped through my body. Was it… Was all the blood coming from _me_?

I vaguely realized that I was going into shock from the major blood loss, but it's like there was a curtain separating me from the real world. I was… drifting. And although I could hear everything, see everything, none of it registered. I just stayed staring at the roof in a kind of indifferent bliss.

I could hear Sam's frantic and angry retorts, the demon got angry too, at one point, but now he was calm. Calm in a way that made me edgy and I felt… not right. Like I had a huge piece of ice inside my stomach. I struggled to listen more carefully, to actually try to pay attention to the conversation.

"… can't save you, Sammy. They won't be able to save you, or darling little Aliese over there."

Why were they talking about me? I fidgeted, attempting to get into a more comfortable position. The demon stared at me with a raised eye brow.

"Why, Aliese, you should have said something. I would have removed your bonds immediately. Do you want me to remove them?" One glance at his wicked smile and devilish eyes, and I tilted my head slightly. Liar.

"No, I'm fine. Thanks for asking though." I replied wistfully, devoid of any emotion other than annoyance. Talking was dragging me away from the comfortable obliviousness, and the thought of entering the world, the conscious and self-aware world, frightened me.

It was the first time I'd seen that certain emotion in Markus's eyes. Surprise. The absurdity of that fact made me giggle, but I caught my breath when it caused my shoulder to shift.

Pain like fire shot through me, made its way up and inside my body. It felt like a thousand knives repeatedly stabbing at me. It felt like being trampled by a herd of wild animals. It felt like being shot over every inch of my body. Veins of pain blossomed along my limbs and traveled to my core, shocking me and killing me slowly from the inside. Somehow, through the layers of unending, relentless agony, I was aware that at least it wasn't Sam being put through it, or even worse, Courtney. For that, I could be grateful. The agony ripping its way through me was too much.

And the pain just wouldn't _stop_. It continued, over and over again, throbbing and pulsing…

The only thing I could assume from the sadistic smile forming on the demons face was that he was the one causing it. My ears were filled with a high-pitched shriek, and it took me a moment to figure out that the sound was coming from _me_.

I could dimly hear Sam yelling, screaming, _"What the hell are you doing? Aliese!"_ but the fog had disappeared and the pain had torn right through the curtain of conscious thought. My screams echoed through out the room, and when the pain disappeared, I just lay there, gasping. Trying to brace myself for another onslaught of torture.

It stopped, for that one moment, and I had to struggle to keep my eyes open. I felt drained, like I was someone in one of my many books. You never really know what it feels like: Torture. You can imagine, but it can't be any where near what it actually feels like. No matter how good the descriptions are.

Catching my breath, I held it for a moment before letting it out slowly. I did that again. I blocked out Sam's frantic screams as I tried to even out my breathing. Once I was confident that I wouldn't fall unconscious if I attempted to speak, I glared straight at the demon smirking triumphantly and said, though the effort caused immense agony; "You're one sick bastard, you know that? Come on, getting your kicks from torturing 16 year old girls?" I turned my head away, disgusted. "Pathetic." I said slowly, pronouncing each syllable. Sam gave a sigh of relief, and laughed softly.

The smirk faltered, but didn't entirely disappear from the demons face. His black eyes gleamed predatorily. "Well, now, that won't be for much longer. As I've been well assured." His response caused me to pause, and the vicious smile grew. With a glance towards the darkened door way, I shuddered. The sight was one that I would not soon forget.

Three demons, two of whom had been my tortures before (the pain was brought into sharp focus); the middle form though, was as familiar as my own face in the mirror. "Jace… Oh god, what have they done to you?"

"This one," Markus said, pointing to Jace. Courtney's best friend. "Seems to have lost his voice for the time being. Pity, seeing as we'll be having… company soon."

The words were lost on me, but apparently not on Sam. "You touch them and you're dead," he hissed, sounding sincerely frightening. "I'll gouge your heart out myself."

Markus's eyes widened in mock fear. "Oh dear, I've got a hunter pinning out for me. Oh my, how will I ever be able to live in fear? What'll you do, boy? Scratch me with that magic demon killing knife of yours?" He snorted, and the action was mirrored by the two nameless demons I didn't know. Jace – the demon – just stared at me. I felt the shiver of fear trickle down my spine. "Gag him, Balthazar," the statement was almost an after thought; Sam's eyes grew wide, and as the demon, Balthazar, tied the grimy cloth over Sam's mouth, I glared at the ceiling, wishing I wasn't so goddamn helpless.

_Fuck, Courtney, what's taking so long?_

"Azishik," Markus addressed the other demon. "Do go see what it is that's keeping our guests."

I wanted to slap that permanent evil smirk off his face. I'd stopped thinking of him as Markus, the boy from school, my first boyfriend. Now, when I saw those black eyes, all I could see was Markus, the black eyed teletubby-baby sun, because that baby sun is the only thing in the world that freaks me out and disgusts me at the same time.

My eyes felt like they should be able to move separately, watching every corner of the room at the same time. God, sometimes being an alien might be a good thing. Here's hoping that aliens actually have more than two eyes.

The pain was making me illogical, slipping in and out of reality. Sam struggled uselessly at his bonds. A thought occurred to me, and I closed my eyes. I could almost feel the curiosity of Markus as he stared at my form. Maybe he thought I was close to dying, but hey, who says that would have been such a bad thing?

I closed my eyes as tightly as I could; attempting to remember anything and everything Courtney had ever taught me about my ability. Let me tell you, even in a world based on freakish things and harsh realities, Courtney and I were the odd ones out.

One of the first things I learned; demons don't have thoughts, none that I can hear, anyway, so when I stretched my mind, trying to find that… wall, and I found it, I knew it could only have belonged to Sam.

I wasn't ready for the thoughts that assaulted me as I opened that door.

_I'm sorry, Dean, for leaving. For Dad and everything…_

_I'm sorry I couldn't protect her, Courtney… I'm sorry you couldn't trust me… _

_Well who's going to stop Dean from his stupid, impulsiveness now…?_

_It's my fault. I shouldn't have left…_

All these thoughts, these admissions that would never be spoken aloud, I had access to all of them. Although, I'm not sure I wanted too. Sam, stupid Sam and his self-loathing, his beliefs just made me guilty as hell for even entering his mind. One thing I took the time to laugh silently at though; Sam's thoughts were such a _girls_… Dean would have a field day with this.

Even though his previous thoughts shocked me and caused the knotted feeling in the bottom of my stomach to expand, it was only the next realization that caused me to pull back.

_Courtney… Courtney, I still love you…Please. Forgive me. _

I was jolted back to reality by the sudden pressure and tearing agony that emanated from shoulder. I gasped and came to and tried to roll over to shield myself from the pain, but the chains impeded that plan. "Bitches," I hissed through the pain, even as the agony doubled. I whimpered pitifully and resigned myself to stillness. The pain didn't hurt as much when I didn't move. Markus motioned for Jace to come over, and when the gag was placed over my own mouth, all I was aware of was the taste; something between a mix of salt water, soap, engine fuel and rotten milk. I gagged and heaved, but nothing came up. Probably because half of the contents of my stomach were lying outside my body at this point.

Markus stood over me, fingering a blade over my gashes. "You feel that?" He whispered harshly, bending down to hiss in my ear. "Now, imagine that a hundred times worse; and you could possibly come close to how much I'm going to make your dear, big sis hurt. Don't worry," he announced, pulling back so that he could meet Sam's loathing gaze. "Sammy and you have front row seats, and Azishik will make sure you stay awake for this."

I cursed and bitched and screamed around the gag, but the muffled speech fell upon deaf ears. Markus slowly walked around the table so that he stood in front of Sam, and my heart picked up pace.

"Sammy, Sammy, Sammy… Now, you look pretty calm over here. You gonna look like that when they drag in your little girl friend through those doors?" Sam tried to ignore the taunts, I know he did, but stupid, fucking demons knew exactly what buttons to push. "Or how about when they walk through and tell me that your loving older brother was giving them a hard time and, oh… he didn't make it."

Sam pulled against the restraints, his eyes fierce with anger, and I couldn't blame him. I began to struggle, trying and failing to ignore the pain shooting constantly through me. How was it possible to still feel this much pain when I should be half dead? I was still as alert and responsive as ever, although I did feel a little sluggish trying to move, but still… My head was clear, but when every jolt of pain hit me, the thoughts suddenly jumbled together.

"No matter what you do, Sammy, no matter what they do, they _will_ die." Markus spoke with so much conviction, so much sincerity, that even I found it hard to doubt him. Just because I found it hard didn't mean I didn't find a way, though. My way was just… a little different than conventional realistic methods.

"And so Sammy boy, when my friends walk through that door, you'll do what I tell you too. And you'll tell Courtney that we forced you to cut up her sister."

I gagged again. Sam suddenly became as still as a statue.

"And then," Markus taunted, pulling the blade across Sam's cheek. Sam winced ever so slightly, almost imperceptibly. "You'll tell her you're sorry, because as much as it pained you to do it, you enjoyed it. What'd you say, Sam? Deal? You say that, and I just might let you walk out of here alive."

The thought was sickening, and I knew there was no way in hell Courtney could ever consciously consider that possibility.

_Stupid, idiotic bitch. No one gets away with telling my sisters Sammy what to do._

Markus pulled off Sam's gag, and the first thing Sam did was spit on his face. Good ol' tortured but strong hero. I had to admire his strength, even as mine faded ever so slowly from me.

"I think I'll pass," Sam snapped, shrugging away from Markus's grasp.

_Oh no…_

Teletubby-baby sun took a step back, and I held my breath as he raised his arm; the arm holding the 5 inch long blade.

But, like in all stories and movies, this is the part where the good guys rush in, guns blazing, and then Courtney kicks some serious ass, puts some magic healing stuff on my injuries, and then she and Sam go off into the happily-ever-after that they've always deserved.

Usually, in the movies, the heroes aren't tied up and led in by a procession of demons.

Things happened slowly in my mind, but much too fast in real life. My mind raced to keep up. Sam and I saw Courtney and Dean. They had come to save us! But then my brain registered the fact that they had their arms tied behind their backs, and Courtney's forehead was bleeding, along with Dean's lip, and the demons pushed them into the room. Courtney stared at me with horrified eyes. Dean's face was a mask of pain. Sam just stared at Courtney and Dean as if his last hope in the world had suddenly broken. Which, may I point out, is exactly what had happened.

I stared at Courtney, my eyes dry and the pain surprisingly dulled.

Courtney stared at me with agonized tears forming in her eyes.

"I love you," I whispered.

"Well now," Markus intoned, his face bright with anticipation. "This should be fun."


	6. Desire

**Chapter 6 - Desire**

**Dean**

From the point when we'd first realized it was a demon, my undivided attention was solely placed on the Hell Spawn. Without stopping to talk, hell even thinking was out of the question, Courtney moved to the drivers seat of my Impala, while I balled my fist in the demons shirt and shoved it in the back seat, climbing in after it; Ruby's knife never wavering from its heart.

Courtney's gaze was steely and her lips pressed into a thin line. I just stared at the demon, digging the barrel of the shotgun into its side when it even twitched.

"You move, I pull the trigger. You try to signal your demon friends, you're dead. Hell, if you even flinch, there'll be a bullet through your head and halfway to hell before you can even say 'fuck you.'" I growled when I saw his hand subtly reach for the door handle. I could see the ghost of a smile fly across Courtney's face, before the emotionless indifferent mask settled back.

I'd lived through weird before. I'd lived through death (… oh the irony). I'd experienced things so unnatural and unusual that I'd thought these kinds of things couldn't faze me anymore. Well, life's a bitch, and I was wrong.

Sitting in the back seat with a demon willingly is about as weird as it gets.

The hunter in me made every rational instinct tell me to just kill the thing. Kill it and go save Sam. I had no clue where Sam was, though, and this demon was the only lead we had. Yet it was still a huge relief when a sign announced that we were entering city limits, and I even heard Courtney's sigh of relief.

The demon sat hunched over beside me, it's back stiff and its muscles tensed. I felt a twinge of pleasure at the thought, but the fear for Sam's safety and my longing to kill the supernatural bitch drowned out even that smallest victory.

As we drove down some random street, Courtney looked in the mirror. "You want me to pull in?"

"Sure," I said distractedly, keeping my full attention on the jumpy demon. The motel Courtney pulled into was dark, dirty and best of all, cheap. I grabbed the fabric of the demons shit and pulled it out of my Impala (I'd have to remember to disinfect my baby later), forcing him into the few steps into the dingy room. When the door was closed and I had pushed the demon into the stiff wooden chair, Courtney held her Beretta to its head.

"Start talking." She snapped, and I could only give a faint smile at the girls' assertiveness. She would make one hell of a hunter, if she was given the chance. More like if Sam ever let her.

_You let Sam hunt with you, and now look what happened. Bobby was right, some excuse for family you are._

I pushed those thoughts from my head and tried to listen to the information that the demon was now spouting out.

"… my name is, _was_, Nicolai. When I was 15, I made a deal with a demon. When she came to collect, I had a wife and two kids." Here the demon (I refused to refer to it as Nicolai) paused and took a shaky breath. "I died on July 7, 1989."

"Hang on a sec," I interrupted, ignoring the piercing glare that Courtney sent at me. Demons were liars, and there was no way in hell that _this_ demon could be telling the truth. I continued. "Demons lose their humanity after that long. They _forget_. That's why they're _demons_."

I could see Courtney considering that information for a few seconds, then she nodded her head. "Touché," she said softly. "So, without lying this time, why were you going to kill Dean?" My eyes narrowed; now the fucking demon knew my name! But I remained silent in disapproval.

Nicolai - I mean, the demon stared at Courtney with wide eyes. No response. I raised my gun higher, but the demons eyes just flicked between us.

The quick _'click' _of the gun cocking sounded like a whip snapping in the ever pressing silence.

"Okay, okay!" The demon - oh what the hell, Nicolai conceded. Courtney smirked triumphantly and glanced back at me. I scowled in response. I couldn't blame the thing; Courtney without a gun was scary enough. "I… some demon named Markus. He said that if I didn't kill him," he gestured to me. "and bring _you_," he nodded his head at Courtney. "back to them, that they'd kill my family."

I was used to demons lying, I was used to them telling me all kinds of things, but this was new. Following orders because your family from before was threatened? What was this world coming to?!?

_Just tell us where Sam and Aliese are_, I wanted to demand._ Tell us and we may let you live…_

_Okay, that's a lie._

"Okay, so you want us to believe that you're killing not because you're a demon, but because they threatened your family? The family that you don't even know is still alive even?" I wasn't buying it. Any of it, and demons usually don't play fair.

Apparently, Nicolai was thinking along the same lines. "You would do it though, for Sam, wouldn't you? Even if you didn't know that he was alive?"

His words caused me to bristle in response. _Stupid demonic bastard!_

But he was right, and he knew it.

Courtney's shoulders tensed and I noticed the slightest quiver of her gun. Nicolai flinched as she pressed the barrel harder into his temple. "Play nice," she stated, and the _'or else' _seemed to hover unsaid after the words. Nicolai gulped.

"How did you manage to drag yourself out of Hell?" Courtney questioned. The one question I didn't want to be asked, because I already knew the answer.

Nicolai's eyes flashed black. "Why don't you ask poor Dean over there. I'm sure he'd love to explain; juicy details included."

Anger. Frustration. Fear. Curiosity.

_Oh shit._

She couldn't get mad at Sam and me for not telling her… could she? _Keep in mind, Dean, that you've only know her for less than 24 hours._

But Courtney just shook her head, gave a false smile and laughed harshly. "So you managed to climb your way out of Hell. I'm not sure I fully believe the 'why' portion of it, but… I'm willing to look past that."

And then she did the stupidest thing that anyone could have done. And I mean _ANYONE_. Even Sam hadn't done anything that stupid. She lowered her gun.

"What the hell, Courtney?!?" I freaked, staring at her as if she'd just turned into some ragging werewolf. God, what was it with Sam and these wolf girls? "What are you doing?"

"I'm playing my game." She responded. Even Nicolai was frozen in shock. "And you're going to help us change the rules." The wicked smile on Courtney's face caused me to get that _'oh no,' _feeling.

I would be too freaked out to refuse. Nicolai obviously didn't share my fear of the girl. At least not now that she wasn't holding a gun to his head.

"No."

"So, what?" Courtney snapped at Nicolai, causing him to shrink the chair. "You go tell this demon guy that you failed? He kills your family? What could you possibly lose?"

I had to admit… The girl gave a valid point.

I thought Courtney had had a death wish before tonight, but then she'd just been suicidal. Her life had been the only one in jeopardy. Now, though, it wasn't just hers. It was mine. It was her sisters. It was Sam's.

Yet she still found the nerve to kneel next to the demon, and make sure that he was actually looking at her, and say, "Please, if you help us, We'll," she paused. "_I'll_ help you find your family."

And even though my instincts screamed at me, chanting _Sam, Sam, Sam,_ begging me to kill the demon now, when he looked at Courtney and nodded, and said, "Okay. I promise." I knew without a doubt that he was telling the truth; because that was the only thing in the world you could rely on a demon for.

Keeping their promises.

"Well, well, Dean. Going soft on demons, are we? That's fine, I'm sure baby brother Sammy will understand. I'm surprised you haven't shot this one yet… Hello, Nicolai."

If there was one sound in the world, one at all that every time I heard it, it made me wish I could stab myself in the ear, it was the sound of _her_ voice.

"Ruby." I gritted my teeth and I could feel the blood seep from between my clenched fingers. One thing surprised me though. When I looked up, almost rubbing my eyes to check if I was seeing things, I was shocked at the pure fury and raw hatred that Courtney's eyes directed at Ruby.

I wanted to applaud her, but the glaring contest Ruby and she were sharing was scaring the shit out of me. Nicolai stared between Ruby and I in knowing interest.

"Courtney," Ruby growled under her breath, her eyes flashing between rage and something deeper. An emotion that said, _I never forgot what you did to me_.

"Ruby," Courtney replied sweetly, putting on her best happy-happy smile. Oh, this girl was _good_. Maybe she should stick around… I could learn from this chick.

Did Sam know that Courtney was best friends with a demon? Did Sam even know that Courtney _knew_ any demons?

More importantly…

Why the hell did Courtney have reason to know a demon?

What I wanted to say was something along the lines of; _you two crazy broads know each other?!?_ But in reality, that sentence would have gotten me a slap in the face, or, because it was Courtney and I wouldn't put it past her, a bullet in the kneecap. So, fearing for my life, all I managed to get out was; "You two… know each other?"

Courtney's sickly sweet smile was still plastered on her face as she turned to me and said, "Oh yeah, Dean. Ruby and I… we go way back. Isn't that right, girlie?"

It was the first sentence from her that I didn't know the hidden message behind, because, well… that was just Courtney. Straight to the point and nearly inconsiderate as to what the reaction is of who she's talking to.

Reliable. Safe. Truthful. Damn, I was really starting to like her, in an… I-almost-want-to-kill-you-but-my-brother-would-kill-_me,_ type of way.

I almost didn't want to ask what she meant. I wasn't entirely sure if I should be grateful or sickened when the information was provided voluntarily.

"Oh yes." Courtney chuckled. Ruby's eternal glare was actually pretty entertaining "Ruby and I… well, let's just say that she's learned a few things from me."

The next sentence felt like a stab in the gut. Then they twisted the blade to make sure the blood flow wouldn't be easily stopped.

"What did you ever do with that knife, anyway?" Courtney asked Ruby in genuine curiosity.

The only thing I could say was choked out breathlessly. "Hold on, _You_ made the knife? The demon killing knife? _The_ Knife?"

Courtney's only response was a curious glance and a short nod. "So… you gave it to the Winchesters?"

As if my life couldn't get any more fucked up.

"Just like you told me too," Ruby seethed.

Anger flared within me. "And here I was thinking that you gave Sam the knife to help kill Lilith."

At this, Courtney's playfully sweet anger all but disappeared, and for the first time since I'd met her, her face flushed ashen. "Sam?" She whispered breathlessly. "Lilith?"

That's when I realized that Courtney had no knowledge of any of the things Sam and I had gone through for the past few months. Half of me was grateful. Half of me was saddened by what she might think of Sam. No matter how much she terrified me, no matter how much I wanted to drive the knife right through her heart, Sam loved her. I could tell just by the way he looked at her and how brooding he'd been since we found her.

And Sam was my brother. To kill her would hurt him, and hurting Sam was the last thing I wanted to do.

When Ruby glared at me though, that glare that says _you should have shut your mouth_, I became aware that the fact that Courtney didn't know might _not_ have been the problem.

"Oh this is great," Nicolai announced; his eyes bright and his face masked with a smile. He was staring at Ruby, and from the expression on his hosts face, I was glad. "Ruby, really… I swear. You deserve a prize or something."

"Oh, bite me," Ruby snapped, and Courtney gave Nicolai a nod of approval.

"Gladly," Nicolai responded sweetly. He licked his lips.

I stared at Nicolai in disgust. "Dude," my voice was low; too low for anyone to hear. Hunter senses included. "That is so not right." But my curiosity burned brighter than Sam's 'idiot' aura. "Now, anyone want to let me in on the inside joke?"

Courtney took a step back to stand beside me, her eyes never leaving Ruby. "You wanna tell him, Ruby… or should I?"

When silence prevailed, it's like Courtney just forgot about Ruby and she turned her back on the demon, turning her full attention to me. Like she didn't think Ruby was a threat. "Have you ever made a deal with a demon, Dean?"

Oh shit. How the hell did she know? Did Sam tell her? She seemed buddy-buddy with the demons. When I didn't respond, Courtney just… kept on talking.

"'Cause I did. Once. A _really_ long time ago."

Oh shit, Sam was going to _kill_ her. Then he'd go all depressed, self pitying and guess who'd have to drag him out of the deep sorrowful pit? Big brother Dean, that's who. Great. This girl was bad news. Not only was she emotionally tied with Sam, but she might very well have been in league with the demons all along.

_Oh Sammy, you sure know how to pick 'em. Crazy as hell and every type of unusual in the dictionary._ I mean, seriously. Making deals with demons?!? My deal was mandatory. I couldn't have avoided it. Sam was… I just couldn't let him die. Not before me. It was my job to take care of him, and making that deal was the only way I knew how.

"My deal wasn't exactly the usual type, and I always knew demons were liars, but Ruby here…" Courtney gave a sharp, harsh laugh. "Ruby here took that to a whole new level. Didn't you, Ruby? Telling me that he was dead? Playing your game on my insecurities?"

"It was my job," Ruby snapped, beginning to pace while Courtney stood patiently, calmly beside me. I just stared at her, whether in disgust or respect I'm not sure. Maybe a bit of both.

As if to clarify, Courtney glanced at me almost offhandedly and said, "She told me Sam was dead. She told me she would bring him back."

I was past being shocked and surprised, so I just responded with a simple, "And you believed her?"

Apparently, that was the right question to ask. Nicolai snickered, Courtney smirked and Ruby gazed at the wall in disconnected rage. "Dean, 587. Supernatural bastards, 0." I muttered to myself.

The words practically flew out of Courtney's mouth, and I had trouble catching most of them. "It was a few weeks after Sam and John had taken off, and I was having visions of Sam. Dying. In a million different ways. I never knew for certain whether Sam was alive until… Well, until last night. God, it seems like longer than that. Ruby came along, said she could bring Sam back, with one catch." She held up a finger.

"You sell your soul, like chocolate to a fat kid."

"Bingo. Nice metaphor, by the way," Courtney replied, nodding her head and continuing. "Like I said, I never knew for sure if Sam was even dead, and I clung to that. Sammy… Sammy told me about demons, and I knew enough not to trust them even at the best of times. So I told Ruby to give me a few days to think it over. I made the knife. Ruby came back, and she freaked." Here, her eyes grew far away and her smile was wicked. "Oh, that was great. Remember that, Ruby?"

I'd never seen Ruby look so… scared before. As a matter of fact, I'd never seen _any_ demon scared before. Not this type of fear. Fear of _someone_; something other than death and being sent back to Hell. It made me reel in shock.

God, why did she feel the need to stop talking? Girls were so complicated! "And…?" I prompted.

"And I… challenged Ruby."

"Challenged?!? You just about fricking killed me!" Ruby screeched, spinning around to face Courtney, her eyes blazing.

"Oh? And that would have been such a bad thing?" Courtney questioned calmly. My coughing covered up the near hysterical laugh. She then turned to me and continued her explanation.

"You said 'first blood,' not an inch from death!"

Just when I was about to throw something in frustration, Courtney sighed. "I told Ruby that if she could beat me in a simple one-on-one, I'd give her the knife. The only thing that could kill her."

"But," Ruby interjected, shaking her head high. Her eyes had that gleam to them; a glint of madness. "If _she_ won, I would have to leave crazy girl and her little boy toy alone, and promise to deliver the knife to 'The Winchester Brothers.'"

The pressure lifted off my chest. A sigh of relief escaped my closed lips. Obviously, Courtney had won.

Which means Sam had nothing to worry about.

The thoughts were jumbled together like a slideshow on fast forward, or… I dunno, that fruit loops bird on drugs. "So let me get this straight… Courtney challenged demon bitch, demon bitch loses… Then what?"

"Then… Demon bitch breaks the rules." Courtney announced bristly. I flinched at the fury that flashed through her eyes. "She was supposed to stay away from Sam."

"Ooh, cat fight." Nicolai cackled. Seriously, what was wrong with this dude? He was seriously starting to freak me out.

But before I could start to fantasize (come on, girls fighting?) Ruby turned on her heels and approached the door. "I'm leaving." She glanced back at Nicolai, her hand hesitating on the door knob. "You should too. Sticking with these people… it's a death wish."

Ruby looked at me. Turned. She stared at Courtney. "Just like they got their precious little Sammy killed." Courtney tensed. "He'll always be in danger, as long as he's around you."

"You are completely delusional, you demonic bitch." Courtney responded, almost saddened by that fact.

"Yeah, well, you better hope so, or Sam's gonna be the fire they cook on tonight in Hell."

And before I could even try to think of a smartass response, she was gone.

* * *

"This was so not part of the plan," Courtney whispered, her bare feet dragging along the moss and leaf covered terrain. I tried not to hiss back a sarcastic response as the demon holding the gun on me drove it deeper into my shoulder blade.

"Jeez, watch the merchandise." I snapped, taking a quick step forward.

"Oh, you won't have to worry about that, Deanie." The female demon leading us replied over her shoulder. "Now tell me Courtney, does baby sister have anything on her to keep her from being possessed?" The question was asked with a flip of hair and a smirk.

Courtney obviously didn't fall for it, just hissed when the demon dragging her dug its fingers into her hip.

No matter how bad Sam and I had it, in the hunting business, girls got it ten times worse. Just glancing at Courtney from the corner of my eye made me want to hurl. Her face was ashen and her hip was bleeding profusely. Sam and Aliese were going to kill me for letting that happen. If we survived tonight.

When Courtney stumbled and fell, the demons just laughed at her, and I stopped and bent down to try and help up. Wasn't much help, seeing as I had both hands tied behind my back, but I let her lean against my shoulder, until the sharp faced demon brought his boot down on my leg and I heard the sickening _crack_ of breaking bones. Fire spread up my leg and I gasped and attempted not to fall to the ground.

"Get up," the sharp faced demon growled, and I limped forward in immense agony.

When we reached the warehouse, I was disgusted. When we stepped inside, the scent of blood caused me to gag.

When I saw Sam and Aliese, I was horrified.

_Nope, so not part of the plan._

---------------------------------------------

**A/N: OKAY!!! So I just have to point out before I get any comments from random people reading my story, I KNOW Dean stole the knife in the season 3 finale, but for now, and for the purposes of this story, lets just pretend that Ruby gave it to Sam at one point. **

And if any of you hadn't realized, this story takes place during season 3, because Dean hasn't gone to Hell yet, and Sam hasn't drank demon blood (the stupid bastard).


	7. Adamant

Chapter 7 - Adamant

**Sam**

The terror and fear in Courtney's eyes nearly drove me to madness. I'd seen Courtney concerned before, I'd seen her with shock and alarm reflected in those glassy green orbs, but _fear_? Fear was an unknown emotion for her. It caused my heart to thump loudly against my chest and my brain to click. If Courtney was scared, the rest of should be fucking terrified.

_God Sam, you sound like such a_ girl_... _My inner Dean taunted. The smartass thought couldn't even fit under the veil of depression that suddenly cut me off from reality.

"_No, no, no, oh _god_ no..._"

Courtney was scared. Dean was fighting at the bonds around his wrist and, with what I could make out from his constant wincing and sharp breaths, was _seriously_ hurt. And Aliese... God, she just wouldn't stop bleeding... Courtney was openly crying.

It was like getting my heart ripped out with someone's bare hands and finger nails. I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry. I wanted to rip their fucking hearts out. I could only manage to blink back the tears while I struggled desperately with the chains cutting into my arms.

Morbid. Depressing. Helpless. Just like always...

The breathless whisper that emerged from Courtney's lips sent a chill down my spine. "Markus," she breathed sadly, but the second name was announced with a trill of pained surprise. "Jace."

The demon called Jace hadn't moved from the far corner. He gazed at her sadly. Markus cackled once before walking over to Jace and, deliberately never taking his eyes off Courtney, dragged a blade over the demons chest. For a second, the demon's eyes flashed from black to brown, and a hiss of agony escaped through closed lips.

Even the physical pain I was in was blocked out by the look of horror displayed openly on Courtney's face. She stared at Aliese with relentless intensity.

_We're going to die... _

Life sucks. The sudden intense urge to get out and rip each and every one of the demons heads off gripped me and my vision stained red.

_Courtney's going to die... Just like Madison..._

_Just like Jess._

"_What the fuck did you do to her?_" The shell of concern and shocked silence shattered like a bullet to glass as the words erupted, one after another from Courtney's mouth. The demon behind Dean, the only female one I'd seen, stepped forward and slammed the butt of the gun down on the back of Courtney's head. She yelped in surprise and collapsed to the ground, her face making contact with the edge of Aliese's slab. My constant shifting was causing the back of the seat gouge deeper into my ribs and shoulder blades. The seat was rigid and sharp; my posture was stiff and awkward.

"Courtney!" The cry of indignation the emanated from me was enough to draw the attention away from Courtney, who was picking herself up the floor with extreme difficulty. A new gash had appeared on her forehead and the blood gushed over her blackened eye. The intense need to run over to her was pushed to the forefront of my mind.

_She's in pain, you idiot! Get over there and help her, or she'll be dead. Just like Jess. Just like everyone you've ever loved. _

_And what about Dean?_ His face was pale with blood loss and I could see the sliver of gleaming bone poking through his heavy, blood soaked jeans. He gave me that cocky, _'don't worry about me, Sammy,'_ grin and I had to fight to keep from throwing up.

_Stupid selfless bastard,_ I wanted to scream at him, but if I screamed, they would remember the gag. The thought of having that thing anywhere near my mouth ever again disgusted me beyond belief. I clamped my mouth shut.

"That the best you got?" Courtney gave a breathless laugh, her pain disguised by a mocking smirk. Other than Aliese, I was the only one who would notice the way her bottom lip trembled and the constant flick of her head. To anyone else, she would just look frightened. To me, she looked like she was thinking; planning.

The girl demons laugh was almost innocent, like water trickling on a flower petal, but to my ears it sounded like a chains being dragged across broken glass. "You wanna see what I can _really_ do, girlie? I could try it out on Sammy over there, or maybe baby sister wants a turn."

"Now, now Rashka, let's not be rude." The statement was directed at the female demon; she was beyond lucky that I was tied down. Courtney gave a harsh laugh. "Azishik, show our guests to their seats." The demon Aliese had identified as Markus cackled, staring at Courtney with sickening eyes. Already I wanted to shove my hand down his throat and pull out his insides, but when his eyes briefly flicked to me then back to Courtney, making sure I'd seen the glance, my imagination stepped up a notch. The thoughts of torturing and pain were probably unhealthy of me, but when that look... that hungry look full of greed and longing; when it fell on Courtney, I couldn't stop myself.

_Why did you have to get yourselves caught, you idiots? Dean, why didn't you protect her?_

The demon called Azishik grabbed Dean's arm roughly and pushed him forward, nearly falling over. Dean hissed at the pain in his leg and I felt a stab of emotional pain. My brother, my flesh and blood, was hurting and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

"Hey Sammy, come here often?" Dean asked breathlessly through the pain, his childish, cheeky grin covering up the grimace of agony otherwise displayed on his features.

Azishik shoved him harshly into the seat next to mine and threw the chains around his form, not caring when they twisted roughly against his broken leg.

Rashka turned to lead Courtney to the second, matching stone slab. She leaned down to whisper in Courtney's ear, and as the hiss emerged from the demons lips, Courtney's frightened eyes changed, green fire bringing back the bitter hatred and raw disgust. Hope flickered weakly in the deepest recesses of my mind. For some reason, demons were just unnaturally afraid of Courtney.

"You cruel, worthless bitch," Courtney whispered harshly back, still doubled over by the pain. "Then again, you're just jealous of my insane beauty and sexiness." Rashka growled and raised her hand. Courtney didn't even flinch. Quite the opposite, actually, her eyes shone with triumph.

"Rashka…" Markus warned, the smile fleeing his face for only a moment.

"Oh, come on, Mickila. We have all the time in the world… Can't we at least have some fun first?" Her voice was teasing and low as she flicked her long black hair over her shoulder, and I could almost guess at Dean's thoughts; _if she wasn't a demon…_

Markus didn't answer, but the mischievous smirk was enough of a reply.

My hands yearned to be wrapped around the demons neck, the longing so intense that not for a moment did I stop to even question what it was that the demon had told her.

Her glare told me that the hands-wrapped-around-demon-throat thought was running through her mind too. Courtney squirmed and kicked and even tried to smash her head against Rashka's face before she and Azishik were able strap her down onto the table.

This whole time, Aliese's gaze never drifted from the ceiling. Where, through a minuscule hole in the metal, the stars gazed back. She hummed. "_Twinkle, twinkle li'tl starr…_" Her lips barely moved.

Markus just stared on in pleased approval.

The thought that anything, even a demon, could look at a young girls pain in approval made me feel sick in the pit of my stomach. The humming stopped. Courtney began to whisper frantically to Aliese.

"Let them go," the livid words burst sharply from my throat, impulsive and breathless, and I wished they had volume and mass so that maybe, maybe the words could be as painful as I meant them to be. They weren't though, and the words sounded demanding;

desperate. I couldn't care less. My internal desperation was clouding my mind; making me irrational. "Let the girls go, and you can do whatever you want. I'll do whatever you want."

"Sam!"

Azishik, Rashka and Balthazar laughed harshly, their laughter like blades driving through my spine. I ignored them, just staring pleadingly with as much dignity as I could find in me.

Dean stared at me, his eyes wide with horror. Aliese shifted uncomfortably on the metal slab, totally ignored. Courtney's gaze cut deep into my soul, and I knew what she was thinking without words.

_What the hell are you thinking, you dumbass?_

Near hysterical laughter threatened to bubble from my lips. Markus's scrutiny was filled with playful curiosity. "Now, Sam, why ever would you want to do that?" He tilted his head. The movement looked more than weird on the black haired, black eyed demon. I almost wanted to slap myself at the absurdity of the situation.

Sam Winchester… making a deal with a demon. After everything Dean and I had been through. After Dad had sacrificed his life for Dean. I was resorting to this.

Dean's glare gave me the impression that he was thinking along the same lines. "Sam, dude just shut your mouth. You don't know what you're saying." He growled frantically, while the demons smiled at us in glee.

"_No, no, no, no, please Sam, no._" I could softly hear Courtney's desperate plea and it all but broke my heart. I couldn't just sit here and let it happen, because through all that was happening, Courtney and Dean had yet to realize it. The identical stone slabs, the sigils positioned directly above Aliese and Courtney's heads. The seemingly random symbols drawn in blood on the walls of the warehouse.

All of the signs of a typical sacrificial ritual, just as Aliese had pointed out. She hadn't specifically known what type of ritual it was, though.

One that would summon a demon, a very powerful demon, straight out of Hell.

Lucky us.

But I wasn't giving in. I wouldn't let her die. Everyone else I'd loved, I hadn't gotten the chance to save. I wasn't going to let Courtney die too, and all because of me.

"Now, now, Sammy," Markus intoned, circling slowly around Aliese. Taunting Courtney. Taunting me. "You _really_ don't want to do that."

"No, I really think I do."

"Sam." Dean warned heatedly, ignoring as Rashka pulled against the chains, tightening them around the shattered bone. He flinched and hissed. "Don't."

Markus smirked, glancing between Dean and I. "Maybe we _can _work something out."

This brought on a string of curses from Dean that even he would be ashamed to admit of later on, and a frantic response from Courtney, who was pulling at the chains so hard that it was a wonder she wasn't delirious with blood loss. "Sam, I swear to _god_, if you agree to _anything _that bastard says-"

"Your girl friend's right, boy. You don't really want to make me a deal. After all… who do you think would be the one to save you?" The triumphant smirk just about sent me over the edge. Markus trailing a hand over Courtney's leg sent a fury so deep and so strong through me, that I swear it was something tangible and alive. Courtney bit back the whimper that momentarily escaped lips.

"Leave. Her. Alone."

Too many things happened at once. It was hard to remember, let alone comprehend. I noticed things at separate times, even though they may not have been in order.

The first thing I noticed was Courtney fidgeting, her face contorting in pain. Then the fidgeting became awkward twitches, until finally they escaladed into full out spasms. Her mouth snapped open in a silent scream of agony, moments before I could actually hear the sound. My mind was frozen in dread. Aliese groaned and gave a wet cough, blood seeping from her mouth. Dean was pulling, tugging hard at his chains, unsure of what else to do, but his eyes bright in anticipation.

I couldn't move.

Rashka, Azishik, and Balthazar stood almost up against the far wall, their lips moving but the hiss that escaped too low for me to make out. Markus's sadistic grin was the only thing to warn me, and even that took me a long time to realize.

_No, no, no… No, this can't be happening._

Panic gripped me and it was so sharp, so painful that I could almost feel it cutting into my flesh, gouging it away slowly. I'd only just found Courtney again, after all this time. I wasn't going to lose her.

And Dean. Dean, who survived through everything. He was looking pale and drawn and I'd never, ever in a million years seen him look that vulnerable and… helpless.

Now, that was when the weirdest thing happened. Even while Courtney was convulsing in pain, and Aliese was coughing up blood and Dean was trying uselessly to free himself and I just _sat _there, weird was still able to happen. In this case, it was in the form of a car smashing through the far side of the warehouse with a deafening screech of tearing metal and the sound of the metal car scraping up against the siding with resounding force.

Worse than nails on a chalk board, I'll tell you.

The sight of the beat up old truck crashing through the barren expanse of silver wall and impaling a demon on a random piece of splintered wood would have been hysterical in any other situation. As it was right now, the only thing that went through my mind was a simple, _what the fuck?_

Dean's grin split his whole face, colored only by the hopelessness of the situation. Markus's face turned sour, and it caused the briefest smirk to fly across my features. _Serves you right, you sick, sadistic bitch._

I was beyond the realm of confusion. The bewilderment that I felt, or didn't feel… The emotion had no name. The only thing that brought me comfort was the soft, almost invisible smile blooming on Courtney's face. It was almost peaceful.

Courtney and Dean had a plan.

The thought brought a relief so profound that I could feel it in my joints. It was like a wave of cool calmness crashed over me, dragging me under the surface. Courtney and Dean had a plan. Everything was going to be okay.

Even the fact that Courtney had managed to tie Dean down for a few moments to even _think_ of a plan couldn't have amazed me more.

In the span of almost two seconds, the driver had jumped out of the car, slit Balthazar's throat, whose was pinned against the wall and turned to see Rashka charging at him, her face a mask of violent fury.

Markus gave a roar of outrage.

I wanted to applaud them, Courtney and Dean, I really did. This was probably the stupidest, most irresponsible, most dangerous rescue plan they could have ever possibly thought up. They were _crazy_ with a capital Y. I'd always known Dean was a little _off_, insane even, but Courtney?

The truck driver didn't pause once as he shoved the knife, Ruby's knife, deep into Rashka's chest, her skin flickering and glowing an iridescent yellow for only a second before the human girls body dropped lifelessly to the ground. The bile rose in my throat. Markus hissed to Azishik, who was picking himself off the ground, before the truck driver stopped, not even having to struggle for breath. Who _was_ this guy?

"Well, well, well. If it isn't our own little tainted angel." Markus's words were all but lost on me. "Hello, Nicolai. Long time, no see…"

"Hello, Mickila." The drivers eyes flashed black.

"I see you managed to escape from Hell this time. I wanted to ask you… have you found your precious family yet?"

_Whoa, whoa, whoa… _My brain screamed, and I glanced frantically between Dean, who was staring incredulously at Nicolai, and Courtney, who was softly cooing to Aliese, tears dripping down her face and her eyes insistent. Aliese's chest hardly moved with breath.

_Nicolai is a demon?!? _And Dean was trusting him with not only our lives, but Courtney and Aliese's as well?

Aliese and I had only been gone a few hours, at best!

"Well Sam, is this one hell of a rescue mission or not, eh?" Dean interrupted sardonically, his face contorted in concentration and pain.

_Rescue mission my ass!_

With a swift kick to the gut, Azishik was thrust against the wall and Nicolai held the knife against his throat. At the same time, the chains dropped loosely from around Dean, and I stared at them suspiciously. _Oh sure, just fall off for Dean, but when I'm struggling with them for nearly four hours they don't even budge. _

Seeing as Markus, or Mickila, or… Whatever, Markus/Mickila was busy joining in the fight with Azishik and Nicolai, Dean jumped up and raced to my side (well, as fast as he could with his broken leg), pulling his lock picking kit out of his shoe. In any other situation, I would have laughed and shook my head. Now was not the time.

"Dean, you're insane. No dude, you're beyond insane. If you weren't my brother, I'd be tempted to shoot you right now, that's how crazy you are." I ranted breathlessly as Dean impatiently started picking the lock.

"Oh come on, princess. We'll talk about this later." He grunted, and my hands started to twitch and shake. _Hurry up, hurry up… _

When the chains finally loosened up enough for me to move, I was tempted to take a moment just to revel in the feeling. _Freedom…_Perhaps the best thing on the planet, but my concern for Courtney and Aliese outweighed even concern for myself.

"Courtney," I whispered, beginning to work at loosening the chains. "Courtney, I'm going to need your help to get Aliese out of here." I said when she refused to even look at me. She just stared almost lifelessly at Aliese's all but still body. There was so much blood, too much to even think of moving her but…

"She just wanted to help." Courtney sobbed softly as I finally felt the chains give. I pulled at them faster. "She always just wanted to be like me, and… I never stopped her."

Seeing Courtney cry felt like my heart had been ripped out and stabbed at with a million stakes, each one sharpened to perfection. "She's going to be fine," I muttered, feeling the chains give way. They slid to the floor but Courtney just lay there. "Aliese is going to be fine." I said more defiantly, sliding my arm under her neck gently, forcing her into a sitting position.

Through all of this, I was all but detached from the miniscule demon war that was taking place all of 10 feet from me. Dean had his back to us, defending our position. One of the best fighters out there, people always said about Dean. I didn't contradict that statement in the slightest. The body Azishik had been inhabiting was slumped against the wall, inert. I had no doubt that Dean had killed the damn _sonovabitch_. Now it was just Dean and Nicolai against Markus, and as much as I hated to believe it, Markus was one hell of a fighter.

No problem.

It took a few seconds for me to push Courtney over to Aliese, but when I did, I let her lean against the stone and turned on my heels, racing for Dean's form. Just as I turned, I saw Nicolai's body being thrown the air. I had to jump to the right, my body hitting the siding hard to avoid being hit by the body. Nicolai tumbled to a stop a few feet away, and before he could get up and shake himself off, I had grabbed Ruby's knife from his slack grip and turned back to the fight, just in time to see Dean shoot Markus in the chest, just to buy some time.

_BANG!_

The adrenaline flowed through my veins, the fury at all things supernatural, the pain that I knew Courtney and Aliese were in and the rage at the demon for even thinking about touching Courtney all pushed me forward, where, for that few seconds, I could see the defeat written plainly on the demons face.

The feeling… the feeling of the knife sliding through flesh… When every other time I'd ever done it, I had felt nothing, no regret, no relief, just blank nothing.

This time I felt satisfaction. Satisfaction at watching the demons face momentarily crumble in pain before the flickering glow filled him and his mouth opened in a silent scream. And then the body just dropped to the floor.

And once again, I felt nothing.

Dean was breathing hard, the night was silent for all but Courtney's soft sobs and whispered words. I stared at Markus's face in confusion, before turning back to Dean. He just stared at the body, then turned to Courtney, his eyes the only indication that the scene he was witnessing disturbed him.

Courtney was cradling Aliese's head in her hands, the anguished tears pouring like raindrops down her face. "It's going to be okay, Allie. They can't have you. I won't let them." She sobbed brokenly, trying to hide the tears in her voice. "Sam said-" She cut off, the sobs wracking her body. She closed her eyes. "Sam said he's going to get us out. And we have to listen to him, trust me. He'll get us out.

"You're going to be okay."

Courtney's whisper held all the promise of a parent telling their child that the monster in the closet wasn't there, or that everything would be okay.

Because everything _wouldn't_ be okay. I'd known stronger people, healthier people who hadn't survived wounds like Aliese's, who should technically have died already. I wouldn't tell Courtney that. She deserved that last piece of hope.

"She's gonna be okay, right? You'll save her?" Courtney asked insistently, her eyes boring into my own. But her words meant more than that, more than what she was asking. She wasn't only asking if Aliese was going to be okay, but that Courtney would also, and that when the time came, I would save _her_. Save her from the pain and heartache.

"Sam…" Dean said softly, warningly. Warning me that that was a promise I couldn't make, let alone keep.

"Yeah," I choked out, surprised to find tears of my own flowing from my eyes. "Yeah, it's all going to be okay."

That was enough for Courtney, just to have that denial, that obliviousness. Aliese's skin was pale and drawn, her mouth coated in a layer of blood. Her eyes flickered beneath closed lids and in the pure silence, we could all hear her labored breathing. The pain displayed on Courtney's face was unbearable for me to witness, and I had to advert my gaze. Unfortunately, it landed on the inert body huddled in the corner. The very breathing, very alive, very _possessed _form of Jace. As if Courtney's life couldn't be any worse. The hunter in me tensed to spring, but hazel eyes met my gaze regretfully. I growled.

"Sammy…?" Dean asked anxiously, before he followed my gaze. Dean swore and reached for the gun stowed safely in his belt, knowing it was useless. Courtney turned to see Jace, and gave a wail of despair, clutching at Aliese more firmly. Aliese gave the tiniest flinch in response, but that cause Courtney's hope to flicker.

"I swear to god, I'm finished with demons for today." Dean said angrily, holding up his gun.

It took me a few seconds to realize that Jace's lips were moving, and a few steps to finally hear what he was saying. "… midnight sun rises at noon…. blood red moon sets at dawn… gun fire sings a pleasant tune… as the screams go on and on…"

Dean stalked forward, all intent on killing the demon, but its words… hell, it was like hearing one of those children singing the nursery rhymes in a horror movie. Freaks the hell out of you. "Do you want to say something, bitch?" Dean asked, then before the demon could answer, there was a bullet lodged in its shoulder. It didn't even flinch.

Dean took the knife from me, holding it to Jace's throat. He barely hesitated.

But Jace's gaze turned back to me, and he stopped talking. A smirk filled his face, and he laughed harshly. "You're dead, Sam Winchester."

"Not before you," Dean retorted, but before he could even flinch, a pitch black smoke issued from Jace's mouth, and his scream filled my ears. Courtney covered her ears and hugged Aliese.

As Jace's body fell limply to the floor, Dean crouched down. After a few seconds of silence, he said, "He's still alive." I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Of course he is," Nicolai, the random ass demon savior, said as he emerged from the shadows. I think it was more for the effect than actual drama. "A little demon smoke never killed nobody." But then his gaze shifted to Markus, and his eyes brightened. If a demons eyes _can _brighten. "On second thought, I take that back."

"Excuse me, who exactly are you?" I was beyond politeness at this point, and the question was forced through clenched teeth.

"I am help." The phrase was uttered with sickening confidence, and I glanced at Dean in disbelief. _Is this guy serious?!?_ I questioned silently.

Dean rolled his eyes and shrugged as if to say, _just go with it_.

"I can save the girl." When Courtney turned green fiery eyes on him, he said swiftly. "She won't last much longer, even if you manage to get her to a hospital."

I watched in morbid fascination as, reluctant as hell, Courtney pulled away and let Nicolai approach Aliese, who was deathly pale, her lips already a light shade of blue.

Dean shuffled his feet and stared at the ground awkwardly, not sure of what to do as I contemplating walking forward to comfort Courtney. It was my fault the demons had found her, my fault they'd taken Aliese. Hell, it was my fault that they'd tortured her, and I wasn't sure if she'd ever forgive me. She might not even have forgave me for leaving the first time.

But when Nicolai (who I still didn't trust) hovered over Aliese's form and muttered a string of phrases, I tilted my head. Demons could heal people? Well, that was ironic, and _way_ too easy. My suspicions were proven right as Nicolai turned to Courtney, who, after staring at Nicolai blankly for a few seconds, held out her hand. The knife was dragged across her hand before I could protest. Crimson petals bloomed across her skin. Nicolai quickly turned back to Aliese and held the dripping knife over the wounds, which had bled out so much that it looked like her whole stomach had been gouged out. Not a pretty picture.

As Nicolai finished the chant/random word thing, the room was filled with a pale, opaque blue light that was centered around Aliese. As the glow faded, slowly, almost as if it was being pulled into Aliese's body, I could hear the collective sharp breath. Aliese's wounds were all but nonexistent, still fading in harshness and size by the second. She blinked her eyes sleepily.

"Oh god, my head hurts…" The sentence was choked out with immense effort, and Courtney sobbed in happiness. She peeked through her closed lids at Courtney. "You brought me back?" Aliese asked cautiously, almost dreading the answer. Courtney just shook her head, her smile lightened up the room. And then she turned to me, and her smile was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen, and she threw her arms around me.

I kissed her and she kissed me, and without lying to myself this time, I knew everything was going to be okay.

*~*~*~*~*

A/N: Hey everyone!!! So, I hope you liked the chapter, and I just have to say, ONLY ONE MORE CHAPTER LEFT!!!! Yay!!! This is the longest I've stuck with a Fanfiction, and it'll be the only one I've completed, so be happy! There will be a sequel to this story, but I'm thinking of making it just Courtney and Sam's PoV's because I CANNOT write Dean's point of view! It's so frustrating!!! But please tell me your thoughts, I'd love to hear from you! Thanks for reading!


	8. Refuse

Chapter 8 - Refuse

**Courtney**

I was still on a major all time high from the euphoria of Aliese surviving and Sam's kiss. My face felt too small to hold all the happiness that I couldn't express with words; so I just smiled. The sun was only now rising, sending everything into shades of pastel, but it seemed like Sam's face was bathed in a golden, brilliant light.

It was like falling in love for the first time again. That made absolutely no sense, but I couldn't care less. All my thoughts revolved around those two key concepts. _Sam, Sam, Sam… Aliese is going to live… Sam kissed me… Aliese is okay… Sam still loves me._ Aliese's face held that same _'oh my god I can't believe I'm related to you'_ look every time I giggled or laughed, or I found Sam sneaking glances at me. Her expression of disgust was mirrored on Dean's face perfectly. I was too full of light and happiness to try and intimidate him.

Besides, he was already scared of me. If I tried to be any scarier, he'd start sleeping with a knife under his pillow.

Hey, let's face it, its not that he didn't do it already…

Right now placed us on the road, heading for Sioux Falls, South Dakota, home of the legendary Bobby Singer. Sam had mentioned him in passing before obviously, but I had no idea what was so special about the man. I knew enough not to question Sam though, and I would believe him without a doubt.

Currently, I was sitting in the back seat of Dean's Impala (which I made sure to tell him was a sweet ass and insanely sexy car) with Aliese leaning against my shoulder, her breath a soft puff of warmth on my neck. Dean was, of course, driving and Sam stared out the front window, his face void of emotion. Occasionally, he would turn and lock eyes with me, and he'd smile, but I knew something was bothering him.

And me being well, me, with my infinite knowledge of Sam Winchester, caused me to think I knew the reason why.

"You know, Sam," I said softly, trying not to wake Aliese. She'd been through Hell and back, and she needed all the rest she could get. "Dean asked me why I fell in love with you." The question had been brought up awkwardly after Dean and I had informed Nicolai of the plan and had taken a few moments just to get our heads straight. To get ready for whatever we saw or had to deal with. Seeing Aliese like that would have taken me a hundred million years and longer to prepare my composure. I'd always thought that I was invincible, that the fact that I hadn't had nightmares since I was 5 had some kind of deep scale meaning; that I wasn't afraid of everything.

I was afraid, though. I found out that I could be deathly afraid, and I didn't like the feeling at all.

Sam turned around to acknowledge that I'd spoken, and raised his eye brow at me in curiosity. "Oh really?" His lip quirked upward in a kind of playful smirk. It was beyond adorable. It should have been illegal.

"Yeah," I replied wistfully, twirling my hair. "He asked me how someone as unattractive and normal and geeky as you could catch the attention of someone as attractive and selfless and modest as me." I was laying it on pretty thick, and even though Sam knew those weren't the words Dean had used (seeing as when I'd said them, Dean had started choking and coughing), he played along. I smiled cheekily.

Sam put on a frown of mock annoyance and turned to Dean.

"You know man, there are other ways than staring at me, trying to project your thoughts, to finally tell me that you're gay." Dean said after a moment, shifting uncomfortably as Sam just stared at him.

I couldn't hold back the laughed that burst from my throat. Sam's eyes smiled, but his frown just deepened.

"So now you're trying to steal my girlfriend?"

Dean's silence couldn't have answered any more clearly. "No."

Sam snorted. "Uh huh. Right…" Sam just glanced at me and winked, telling me that it was all in good fun.

Aliese stirred softly and I held my breath, hoping that she wouldn't wake up. My heart still broke when I looked at her, my mind flashing to the images that I wished desperately to repress and never, ever have to look at again. Aliese bleeding… Aliese strapped to a table…

Aliese in so much pain. I owed Nicolai so much more than a simple thank you.

I shook my head, as if the simple action would shake away the thoughts, like leaves clinging to the branches of a tree. The thoughts came straight back, but I ignored them, clearing my throat, a thought came to me. Aliese and I hadn't eaten in… near three days now.

My stomach growled.

"I'm hungry." I complained suddenly into the awkward-car silence. And because I knew that most men go straight for pizza, I added, "Lets go get burgers." I knew Aliese would approve.

I didn't expect them to just smile and say 'sure,' but after what they actually did, I wished they'd done the alternative.

There was this five second silence where Dean just stared at Sam with wide, pleadingly innocent eyes, like a kid begging for a new toy. "Please Sammy?" Dean whined suddenly, only taking his eyes of Sam to check the road ahead.

Sam just stared at him with that, _'WTF?'_ look on his face. "Please, what?"

The next words out of Dean's mouth would be catalogued in my list of 'weirdest things people have ever said about me'. And it made top of the list. That was a big achievement, seeing as that spot was currently filled by the comment "she looks like one of those girls who would try to recruit me to join the war against garden gnomes and sign a petition to burn all the rainbow colored toe socks."

Dean's was even weirder, trust me.

"Can we keep her?"

"Dean, man, she's not a _possession_." Sam replied incredulously, while I just sat in the back seat in silence, my face turning purple from trying to contain the hysterical laughter that threatened to bubble up from my throat. I gasped and pulled the air through my lips quickly. Sam and Dean turned around and notice my expression, and I couldn't hold it in any more. I don't think I've ever laughed so much in my life.

After about ten minutes of continuous laughing which would stop and start randomly, along with Dean and Sam's constant glares, I finally sobered. Well, enough to start speaking without having to stop in the middle of the sentence to giggle.

The only thing in the car was silence. Silence, Aliese's soft breathing, silence…

"I'm still hungry." I said into the silence. Dean chuckled. Sam groaned softly.

After Sam's brief promise to both Dean and I, I laid my head over Aliese's, who had disbelievingly stayed asleep through the whole thing. Brushing my hand through Aliese's hair, I started humming a random Linkin Park song, and the lethargic fog finally descended.

I awoke hours later, or maybe minutes, I'm not really sure, to the sound of Sam's soft voice.

"… can't just take her along, Dean." .

"But Sammy… the girl likes burgers!" Dean said it as if that one fact outweighed everything else that could possibly be a factor. "And yeah we could just take her along, you're just too damn stubborn. She would be helpful on a hunt, you can't deny that Sam." It took me a few seconds to realize they were talking about me, and then I just pretended to stay asleep

I stifled the satisfied smirk that hovered over my face and kept my breathing even and soft.

"I dunno, Dean. It's just…" Sam trailed of with a sad sigh.

"Just what, Sammy?" Dean questioned, and I could almost see the disbelieving and calculating frown on his face. "Just the fact that you're a cursed man when it comes to women? 'Cause lets face it, life is too short Sammy. We know that better than anyone." The statement sent a funny feeling sliding down my spine, and I shivered.

"Dean…"

"No, Sam. I'm serious. What happened with Jessica, you couldn't have stopped that." I could hear Sam try to protest, but Dean just continued on and I latched to the words with a pathetic desperation. I wanted to know every part of Sam's life that I had missed, even the bad parts. "And with Madison… Well, who saw that one coming?"

Madison? Who the hell was Madison?

"Dean… Courtney's different. She's not just some girl that I hooked up with on a random hunt,"

"Neither was Jessica," Dean countered. Sam groaned in frustrated annoyance.

"Dean. Just shut up already."

"Sammy," Dean sighed, and through my lashes I could see Sam's eyes unwillingly turn to his pleading brother. "Think of it as my death wish-"

"Dean."

"I've only got a few months left, Sammy. I'm not leaving you alone when I die." Dean said softly.

"You're not going to die," Sam argued heatedly, and I could see the glimmer of tears in his eyes that broke my heart. "I'm going to save you."

Those words, that promise… it was all I could do not to break out in sobs of anguish. The same words he'd promised me when I'd first met him.

The same words I'd been promising all those people that sometimes I couldn't save. It wasn't until now that I realized that they weren't just words. It wasn't just an empty promise.

"You can't promise that," Dean whispered.

_Yes you can_, I wanted to contradict. I wanted to scream at Dean, the selfish bastard, for even thinking that Sam's promise was empty and impossible. _There's always a way_.

The silence was confining and depressing, and I'd had enough depression in the past few hours to last me a lifetime. I felt like screaming, and I knew it was only out of the intensity of their previous conversation that Sam and Dean hadn't realized I was awake. Silent tears washed down my face.

_Dean is dying?_ The thought was so absurd that I wanted to laugh. After all that Sam had told me about his older brother, after all that I'd witnessed in the last day, the thought of Dean just dying was so ridiculous that I wanted to burst out laughing. It was almost as absurd as the thought of a monkey eating peanut butter.

Wait… did monkeys eat peanut butter?

The only reason I was still alive, still completely sane through my life, was because I had these types of thoughts running through my head at random intervals during the day; random things that would make a normal person _insane_. To me, these were the only thing that kept me _sane_.

"So…" Dean muttered awkwardly after a while, and I almost sighed as the tension deflated through the floor. "What _are_ we going to do with the kid-lets?"

Sam sighed. "I guess we'll have to drop them off at Bobby's."

"_What!? _No!" I shrieked, and the whole pretense of innocent-sleeping girl was lost in the half blink of an eye.

Dean smirked at Sam while Sam just stared at me. Aliese grunted and rolled over, and I had to wrap my arms around her waist to keep her head from hitting the door of the Impala.

"Courtney…" Sam stressed sadly. "You can't come with us."

My anger flickered inside me; the way a panthers tail twitches predatorily as it watches its prey. "Oh? I don't think you have a say in this, Sam."

"Yeah, Sammy, listen to the warrior girl," Dean announced happily, but as Sam's fierce glare met his, Dean frowned. "Shutting up now."

"You're not coming," Sam growled to me, and he turned his back to face the front, but not before I could see the flash of uncertainty in his hazel eyes.

I'd learned from years of experience the one way to a mans heart; food. "Dean? Cheeseburgers and pie?"

"Pie? _Blueberry _pie?" Dean whispered reverently, and he stared at Sam with child-like pleading eyes. "Sammy…" He whimpered.

Sam's disbelieving eyes said all he needed to say; _what am I supposed to say to that?_

I leaned forward and whispered in Sam's ear, "You're supposed to give an exasperated sigh and say 'fine…'" His hair tickled my nose and I made a silent vow to cut it when we got to this so called Bobby's house.

"Courtney, what about Aliese?" Sam said honestly, his eyes betraying the real question. "Do you really want to drag her along on every hunt?"

What he was really saying was: _I can't guarantee your safety, let alone hers. Do you really want to risk that?_

My response was much easier to decipher. "Well, I trust you, Sam. With _both_ our lives. There is no way I'm getting left behind. Again. But…" I hesitated, looking down at Aliese. She wasn't a fighter, a warrior. She was a civilian. A liability, as much as I hated to admit it. "Aliese can't come with us." I conceded.

In the rearview mirror I could see Dean's empathetic frown.

The span of the remaining 13 minutes was spent with Sam staring broodingly out the window, Dean tapping out random Metallica beats on the steering wheel, and me making random nothing noises.

I felt like shaking Aliese awake just so I wasn't alone in the crushing tension.

When we reached the dilapidated old house placed on the outskirts of the city, I breathed a sigh of relief. The house was bordered by a large car garage and my hand twitched when I saw a few of the older cars. I already loved Bobby.

When I saw the form on the Bobby in the faded dawn light, I almost laughed. Robert Singer, hunter extraordinaire, was an old(er) man with a beard and worn out trucker hat. I smiled to myself. He reminded me of my grandpa, sortof, and even though his eyes were hard as stones, I could tell from the worry lines on his face that he was a gentle giant.

Dean got out of the car first, but Sam was the one who opened the door to help me with Aliese.

"Dean," Bobby called gruffly in greeting. "Sam,"

"Hey Bobby," Sam grunted, putting his arm under Aliese's head while I carried her feet. She whimpered when the movement aggravated her still healing chest wound. Nicolai had made the bleeding stop and the wound to disappear, but her insides were still sore and healing,

"The girl okay there?" Bobby asked in concern, seeing how cautious Sam was being and the way Dean hovered at my side, almost ready to catch Aliese if my muscles gave out.

"She's fine," Sam told him truthfully. "Can we bring her up?"

Bobby nodded in the affirmative, and I smiled at him gratefully.

"You know, if I had a third hand, you would not be standing right now," I warned Dean as he raised his arms when I stumbled over a rock. I hated uncoordinatedness. Traveling up the rickety stairs took more effort that I thought possible, and Aliese's long hair snagged in the wooden railing.

When Bobby pushed open his door, even though all of my attention was focused on Aliese, I couldn't help but notice all the piles and precariously stacked books and papers. It was like… a nerds heaven!

I glanced at Sam quickly, and noticed how slack and relaxed he seemed to be in these surroundings. I smirked. I let Sam lead me through the labyrinthine maze of books and up the stairs to the open door on the left of the hallway; a spare room lined with anything and everything related hunting and the supernatural.

Dean and Bobby followed closely behind us, and I listened to their quiet conversation.

"Sam right? The girls gonna be okay?" Bobby asked.

"Yeah, well… We're pretty sure." Dean sighed, and without turning I could tell he was running a hand over his face in exhaustion. "We'll know when she wakes up."

When Sam and I placed Aliese on the bed, he took a step back so that I could tuck Aliese in. I made sure to kiss her on the forehead before I pulled the heavy woolen blanket up to her shoulders.

"Which brings about the question," I heard Bobby mutter from the doorway. "Who the hell are they?"

"Bobby," Sam said slowly. "This is Courtney, my…" But he couldn't finish that statement. I couldn't either. What were we now? Was I Sam's girlfriend? That word didn't seem appropriate. It almost seemed like it wasn't… good enough. The word was too weak.

For right now, I was just Courtney. Sam and I would work on it later. It had been so long since we'd seen each other, actually _known_ each other. I still loved Sam, loved him more than pretty much anyone in the entire world, and even if we found out that we weren't right for each other, I would still love him. But I had things I needed to work out. I'd shot one of my best friends, my other best friend was now in an ambulance being rushed to the hospital in the company of a demon who was afraid of me, and I needed to find out if what I was feeling was some deranged form of hero worship.

"I'm Courtney," I announced, holding out my hand. Bobby shook it hesitantly. "And that's my sister, Aliese."

"You two don't look like sisters," he said speculatively.

I chuckled and nodded. "We get that a lot."

And when Dean rolled his eyes, and Bobby laughed with me, and Sam stared at me with understanding but loving eyes, it was pretty much everything I needed.

"Ow…" I spun when Aliese's voice sounded, and rushed to her side. She blinked up at me with brilliant brown eyes. She clutched at her stomach. "I _really_ want a cheeseburger right now."

*~*~*

Dean just continued to stare at me with wide, awe-filled eyes. I didn't notice. I was too busy shoveling French fries and cheeseburgers into my mouth. The only time I had hand-eye coordination was when I was eating.

I wasn't even listening when Dean turned to Sam and pleaded pathetically. "Come on, Sammy, you gotta let us keep her."

"Yeah, come on Sammy, you know this is really attractive." I replied, covering my mouth with my hand to retain any amount of dignity I may have had left.

Aliese just stared at me in disgust.

"How am I even related to you?" Aliese whispered in revulsion, putting down her own fork.

"You know what," Dean whispered in reverence to me. "You shall now be known as Warrior Goddess, Queen of the Cheeseburgers. And pie! Don't forget the pie."

"Dean," Sam snapped. "Stop trying to hit on Courtney."

"Awe…" I said, moving my chair closer to Sam's. "It's okay, Sammy. Dean's just jealous."

"Jealous? Me? No, I've got my baby, now it's Sam's turn not to be jealous." Dean replied while shoving a fistful of fries into his mouth.

I kissed Sam on the nose and giggled. "Love you, my Sammy."

Sam laughed and Aliese and Dean exchanged mirrored looks of disgust. "I love you, too, Courtney." Sam replied with a kiss on the cheek.

"We done with the chick-flick moment, now, you idjits?" Bobby stared at Sam and me.

And we all burst out laughing, and even though my life had basically just disappeared, and even though I didn't know what my life was going to be after this, I was happy. I had Aliese. I had Sam.

And for the first time in over a decade, it felt like I had a family.

**The End**


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